Silent Voices
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "I Will Burn"Verses of personification
20 total reviews
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I enjoyed the way you personified fire. Fire at times is necessary and can be good or bad. You did a wonderful job showing both in this very descriptive poem. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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I enjoyed the way you personified fire. Fire at times is necessary and can be good or bad. You did a wonderful job showing both in this very descriptive poem. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Thank you!! Xoxo
Comment from Jim Wile
Frightening, Jess. Fraught with multiple warnings not to engage her, it's your own fault if you do. Seductive in her power to lure you, great will power is needed to resist her charms: a warm fireplace on cold winter nights, a crackling campfire, a warm meal, and candle-lit ambiance.
This is a terrific personification of fire and the human-like things it is capable of: If you trust me, I will fail you. If you want me, I will have you. If you touch me, I will hurt you. Best to treat her with respect and at a proper distance. Artfully and vividly written! - Jim
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Frightening, Jess. Fraught with multiple warnings not to engage her, it's your own fault if you do. Seductive in her power to lure you, great will power is needed to resist her charms: a warm fireplace on cold winter nights, a crackling campfire, a warm meal, and candle-lit ambiance.
This is a terrific personification of fire and the human-like things it is capable of: If you trust me, I will fail you. If you want me, I will have you. If you touch me, I will hurt you. Best to treat her with respect and at a proper distance. Artfully and vividly written! - Jim
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Thank you so much, MM!
Xoxo
Comment from QC Poet
Remember that there are three elements to every fore, heat, fuel, and oxygen, it pretty much works out the same way with people. Removing these sources of fuels will prevent you from burning yourself out also. Hopefully your poem is just driven by something external and not internal and stays under control. Writing about your feelings also can be helpful in reducing those flame up feelings, Thanks for Sharing your Writing and Good Luck
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Remember that there are three elements to every fore, heat, fuel, and oxygen, it pretty much works out the same way with people. Removing these sources of fuels will prevent you from burning yourself out also. Hopefully your poem is just driven by something external and not internal and stays under control. Writing about your feelings also can be helpful in reducing those flame up feelings, Thanks for Sharing your Writing and Good Luck
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Thank you very much! I appreciate your concern, but I assure you that I'm quite well. It's just a bit of poetic expression
:)
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
A tad erratic, but so is fire. The feelings you bring out are certainly emotive. Fire can be pretty even beautiful at times. It can warm you without any pain.
But, like anything, it can have a bad side. Good writing. Karen
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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A tad erratic, but so is fire. The feelings you bring out are certainly emotive. Fire can be pretty even beautiful at times. It can warm you without any pain.
But, like anything, it can have a bad side. Good writing. Karen
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Well said, Karen! Thank you.
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:-)
Comment from Jodi Ann Anderson
This is a great way you personified fire. I really love your style. The picture is perfect and the title of your book fits as well. I will have to read all the other chapters!
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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This is a great way you personified fire. I really love your style. The picture is perfect and the title of your book fits as well. I will have to read all the other chapters!
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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I appreciate that so much, Jodi! Thank you!
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
There are several meanings here Jessica, fire will physically burn us if we get too close and it can easily become uncontrollable. There is also that fiery temper we have inside us and once stirred it can attack and maim others and we need to keep it controlled in order not to harm anyone, a poignant and powerful poem Jessica, love Dolly x x x
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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There are several meanings here Jessica, fire will physically burn us if we get too close and it can easily become uncontrollable. There is also that fiery temper we have inside us and once stirred it can attack and maim others and we need to keep it controlled in order not to harm anyone, a poignant and powerful poem Jessica, love Dolly x x x
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Thank you so much, Dolly!
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
I love the way you're able to immerse yourself so completely into these themes of personification and this one is no exception. You respect the subject for its danger as well as its beauty and comfort. But ultimately she see the passion it represents as one that can burn, scar and diminish to ash. Well done, Jess. Debbie
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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I love the way you're able to immerse yourself so completely into these themes of personification and this one is no exception. You respect the subject for its danger as well as its beauty and comfort. But ultimately she see the passion it represents as one that can burn, scar and diminish to ash. Well done, Jess. Debbie
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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You're the best, Debbie, thank you! Xo
Comment from Sally Law
Wow! No messing with the fire ... ever! You personified fire well and the threat fire brings: I will fail you, I will have you, I will hurt you and I will burn you. Magnificent offering, my friend. Sending you all my very best, dear Jess.
Sal Xos
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Wow! No messing with the fire ... ever! You personified fire well and the threat fire brings: I will fail you, I will have you, I will hurt you and I will burn you. Magnificent offering, my friend. Sending you all my very best, dear Jess.
Sal Xos
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Thank you, my friend!!! Xo
Comment from royowen
It's a stream of consciousness, thoughts rather than direct words, sort of thoughts that I would have had when I thought of what I would like to do to them, but my thoughts are not like that any more, but beautifully worded, which makes all the interesting, beautifully written, blessings Roy
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reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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It's a stream of consciousness, thoughts rather than direct words, sort of thoughts that I would have had when I thought of what I would like to do to them, but my thoughts are not like that any more, but beautifully worded, which makes all the interesting, beautifully written, blessings Roy
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Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Thank you, Roy!!
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Bless you
Comment from Mark Jackson
I like it, this is fire out of control. A force of nature that can be harnessed for good but also run rampant. I am pleased that you referenced the positive side of fire whilst focus on destruction. om the most part I really liked the couplets after each stanza personalizing your writing for the reader. I say most part simply because the final couplet feel to week. I feel a poem should end in strength. I will burn you; to me that is not the end of the world. I get burnt all the time, friction burns from power tool and heat burns from my oven. I wanted a much stronger word to end with, a life changing if not life ending finish. However it is still very good and gets 5 stars.
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reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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I like it, this is fire out of control. A force of nature that can be harnessed for good but also run rampant. I am pleased that you referenced the positive side of fire whilst focus on destruction. om the most part I really liked the couplets after each stanza personalizing your writing for the reader. I say most part simply because the final couplet feel to week. I feel a poem should end in strength. I will burn you; to me that is not the end of the world. I get burnt all the time, friction burns from power tool and heat burns from my oven. I wanted a much stronger word to end with, a life changing if not life ending finish. However it is still very good and gets 5 stars.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Thank you, Mark. I appreciate your feedback on the final couplet, and I completely agree with you. I'll revise it.
Thanks again!
Jess
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My thought was consume? But I wasn't all that sure.
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I love that!!! Thank you, Mark.