Jonathan's Story
Viewing comments for Chapter 22 "Between a rock and a hard place"Our fostering journey with a severely disabled boy
26 total reviews
Comment from Marilyn Hamilton
It is heartbreaking what people have to endure as a result of fighting the system. The red tape will kill you before anything else does. You can't question yourself with this decision. You did what you had to do after a long, hard fight. Thank you for sharing such a personal story.
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2024
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It is heartbreaking what people have to endure as a result of fighting the system. The red tape will kill you before anything else does. You can't question yourself with this decision. You did what you had to do after a long, hard fight. Thank you for sharing such a personal story.
Comment Written 17-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2024
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Thank you very much Marilyn for this very compassionate and thoughtful review. Yes, it was a long hard fight, and in they end they'd backed me into a corner. I appreciate very much your kind words.
Wendy
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Oh you made the right decision, Wendy! No doubt about that. You were cornered and bullied into it until there was nowhere else for you to go. And that aspiration fear as well as the threat to kick him out were just the last straw. Ultimately you had to consider your own legal responsibilities. This wasn't failure on your part but a decision that had to be made in light of his current situation brought on by his institutionalised care. You couldn't stand up against the weight of this pressure. Nobody could. But, my goodness, what a predicament you had to battle, expressed so powerfully here. Thank you once again for sharing this incredible story of fortitude on your part! Debbie x
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2024
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Oh you made the right decision, Wendy! No doubt about that. You were cornered and bullied into it until there was nowhere else for you to go. And that aspiration fear as well as the threat to kick him out were just the last straw. Ultimately you had to consider your own legal responsibilities. This wasn't failure on your part but a decision that had to be made in light of his current situation brought on by his institutionalised care. You couldn't stand up against the weight of this pressure. Nobody could. But, my goodness, what a predicament you had to battle, expressed so powerfully here. Thank you once again for sharing this incredible story of fortitude on your part! Debbie x
Comment Written 17-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2024
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Thank you so much Debbie for your understanding and compassion. The six stars are very special too, and confirm to me the importance of telling his story. Power and greed are very corrupting. And yes, they had backed me into a corner, with nowhere to go. But they hadn't finished ....
Wendy
Comment from patcelaw
My heart is tugged with empathy for you, and for Jonathan both. This is a terribly distressing story of how a disabled young man was being treated. I wish you hadn't had to go through that, but I understand that it was not possible for you to take him back into your home and deal with that there either. I wish you the very best with all of your writing and may you continue to show your love to others the way you have shown your love to Jonathan. Patricia .
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2024
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My heart is tugged with empathy for you, and for Jonathan both. This is a terribly distressing story of how a disabled young man was being treated. I wish you hadn't had to go through that, but I understand that it was not possible for you to take him back into your home and deal with that there either. I wish you the very best with all of your writing and may you continue to show your love to others the way you have shown your love to Jonathan. Patricia .
Comment Written 17-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2024
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Thank you Very much Patricia, for this very kind review. The six stars are very special - very encouraging and supportive, so I thank you for those as well. My back could no longer manage his full-time care, otherwise I probably would have taken him back. In the midst of all this I was teaching full-time.
Wendy
Comment from GWHARGIS
I don't think you made the decision. It was like Sophie's Choice. Pick one of your children. There was no right decision. People like that have an agenda in mind. Look at the deaths attributed to Covid in the early stages. Whether it was a heart attack that killed someone or a gunshot, if the patient was tested for Covid and it was positive. Covid related death was the cause. The hospital got more money with ach Covid death. This chapter made me angry and I hate that you were bullied and manipulated. But the lowest form of manipulation is for a Dr or someone in charge to lay the blame on you. I had a doctor tell me my middle daughter needed an operation. It was not needed. She needed medicine. I said no. He smiled , closed her chart and said, " well, don't come crying to me if she gets sicker." I found a new doctor. Great chapter. Gretchen
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2024
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I don't think you made the decision. It was like Sophie's Choice. Pick one of your children. There was no right decision. People like that have an agenda in mind. Look at the deaths attributed to Covid in the early stages. Whether it was a heart attack that killed someone or a gunshot, if the patient was tested for Covid and it was positive. Covid related death was the cause. The hospital got more money with ach Covid death. This chapter made me angry and I hate that you were bullied and manipulated. But the lowest form of manipulation is for a Dr or someone in charge to lay the blame on you. I had a doctor tell me my middle daughter needed an operation. It was not needed. She needed medicine. I said no. He smiled , closed her chart and said, " well, don't come crying to me if she gets sicker." I found a new doctor. Great chapter. Gretchen
Comment Written 17-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2024
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I am glad you found a new doctor. He doubtless would profit from her operation, and operations always carry a measure of risk for the patient. Money and power - yes, they corrupt people for sure. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing - that's always very encouraging to have some support and understanding.
Wendy
Comment from Verna Cole Mitchell
This was the saddest yet because you could not fight the system without their putting the possibility of Jonathan's death on you. I am so glad I was not in your position at that time. I do not see that you had a choice. I don't see how those people with their smirks and self-righteousness could sleep at night.
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2024
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This was the saddest yet because you could not fight the system without their putting the possibility of Jonathan's death on you. I am so glad I was not in your position at that time. I do not see that you had a choice. I don't see how those people with their smirks and self-righteousness could sleep at night.
Comment Written 17-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2024
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You are right. It did not seem to me that I had any choice. It was a very difficult time, for sure. I don't know how they could sleep either. Not only this but the cover-up about his accident .... They were not good people. Thank you so much for reviewing. I appreciate it very much.
Wendy
Comment from Paul McFarland
Nobody should have to go through what you have had to endure. Nobody should have to go through what Jonathan has had to endure. I haver been deeply depressed as when I have read these posts, but I could not refrain from reading them. You must have been scarred for life because of this experience.
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2024
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Nobody should have to go through what you have had to endure. Nobody should have to go through what Jonathan has had to endure. I haver been deeply depressed as when I have read these posts, but I could not refrain from reading them. You must have been scarred for life because of this experience.
Comment Written 17-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2024
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Thank you very much Paul. A kind and compassionate review. The six stars are very special, and validate my writing, and encourage me to continue. So a special thank you for them. I don?t think I am scarred, but I am certainly more wary, and probably more cynical and less trusting. I was probably quite naive when we first began fostering! In a short while, it will become less depressing, I hope. Thank you again.
Wendy
Comment from barbara.wilkey
There's no way to tell if you made the right choice, but you had no option. It's horrible how people in charge think, I doubt they even believe it, they are making the right choice. I think it's simply the easiest. My heart goes out to you.
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2024
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There's no way to tell if you made the right choice, but you had no option. It's horrible how people in charge think, I doubt they even believe it, they are making the right choice. I think it's simply the easiest. My heart goes out to you.
Comment Written 17-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2024
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You are probably right, unfortunately. The easiest and, for them, the safest. Thank you very much for your kind review and support.
Wendy
Comment from BethShelby
As you said you had postponed it for so much longet than most people without someone to advocate for them. You were between a rock and hard place and I can't imagine what else you could do. It is very sad story and I can't imagine a life that started with some much against him from the having a better outcome than the good years you were able to give him. I applaud you for writing this. It had to very hard to write.
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2024
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As you said you had postponed it for so much longet than most people without someone to advocate for them. You were between a rock and hard place and I can't imagine what else you could do. It is very sad story and I can't imagine a life that started with some much against him from the having a better outcome than the good years you were able to give him. I applaud you for writing this. It had to very hard to write.
Comment Written 17-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2024
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Thank you very much Beth. The six stars are very special and very validating and encouraging. You are right. It is very hard to write all this. Jonathan?s story is a very difficult one but for the most part he?s been happy (not knowing the conflicts is sometimes good). Thank you again.
Wendy
Comment from Rachelle Allen
Ugh!! Bureaucrats! They are the vilest of the vile creatures on earth. You did your very, very best and gave them QUITE the solid wall to bang their collective heads upon. But they had so much more experience at winning this battle than you did, dearest Wendy. No one was a more valiant opponent for them, though; I would stake my life on that! I think you are a champion.
The questions you posed are so brilliant and deep. The one that gob-smacked me most of all was: Is it love to keep a person alive but unable to have any control over his own body? Oy.
With every new chapter, I respect and admire you more. You are, without any question in my mind, one of the angels who walk among us. Thank you for this outstanding read this morning. xoxox
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2024
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Ugh!! Bureaucrats! They are the vilest of the vile creatures on earth. You did your very, very best and gave them QUITE the solid wall to bang their collective heads upon. But they had so much more experience at winning this battle than you did, dearest Wendy. No one was a more valiant opponent for them, though; I would stake my life on that! I think you are a champion.
The questions you posed are so brilliant and deep. The one that gob-smacked me most of all was: Is it love to keep a person alive but unable to have any control over his own body? Oy.
With every new chapter, I respect and admire you more. You are, without any question in my mind, one of the angels who walk among us. Thank you for this outstanding read this morning. xoxox
Comment Written 17-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2024
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Thank you so much. Always so encouraging, and so validating. The six stars also help confirm that I am right to bring this story into the open. So a special thank you for them. Had to chuckle at the thought of me being an angel though. Far from it, I am just a tired old lady!
Keep reading - there is more to come, and it gets worse before it gets better. But it does become less depressing, I promise!
Glad you "enjoyed" the read.
Wendy
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But part of what ;makes it so good is that it's NOT all sunshine and ooey-gooey goodie-goodie. No one can take a complete book of THAT!! I hate that it comes in the form of Jonathan being so horribly mistreated, but I know it WILL get to another good part, so that makes the reading captivating. You are doing a truly tremendous job. (And you are so TOO an angel. Real angels never think they are.) xoxo
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lol. Well I can?t argue with that, can I?
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'fraid not, Missy!!
Comment from Wayne Fowler
How heart-breaking. Gut-wrenching. Knowing that you are right and that it's not even about a battle of wills, but a battle for Jonathon's quality of life. You were, indeed, between a rock and a hard place.
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2024
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How heart-breaking. Gut-wrenching. Knowing that you are right and that it's not even about a battle of wills, but a battle for Jonathon's quality of life. You were, indeed, between a rock and a hard place.
Comment Written 17-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2024
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Thank you very much Wayne for this understanding and kind review. Always much appreciated.
Wendy