Jonathan's Story
Viewing comments for Chapter 12 "Leaving Home"Our fostering journey with a severely disabled boy
24 total reviews
Comment from GWHARGIS
This should be a movie. It has the drama, the tender moments and the corruption of the system. The system that should protect him literally dumps him in a hotel. It's heartbreaking. It's inhumane. This is heart in my throat because it's real. Gretchen
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2024
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This should be a movie. It has the drama, the tender moments and the corruption of the system. The system that should protect him literally dumps him in a hotel. It's heartbreaking. It's inhumane. This is heart in my throat because it's real. Gretchen
Comment Written 11-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2024
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It does have all those elements, but who would be able to act in his role? It would certainly bring the story to life - and there would be plenty of people incriminated, as time and further horrors are seen .... but I don't believe I could even watch such a movie myself. Tooconfronting. Thank you so much for the six stars. You wouldn't believe how much they encourage me to continue, for it's not over yet, by a long way. The support they offer is gratefully received.
Wendy
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
I just can't believe how awful this must have been for you. And when you said you were angry, I found myself willing you to get angrier still. So the kidnap came as such a relief and definitely an action I would have taken myself. That said, having done everything by the book up until this point, you must have felt desperation mixed with trepidation to extremes! You prepared us for things getting worse. I couldn't have imagined quite how bad, given the caring, family home setting he'd become accustomed to over those nine years. And all this occurring within a context of family issues and a back problem which, in its own way, is echoing the crisis you're now facing. Horrendous! Thanks, Wendy. My best wishes, Debbie
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2024
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I just can't believe how awful this must have been for you. And when you said you were angry, I found myself willing you to get angrier still. So the kidnap came as such a relief and definitely an action I would have taken myself. That said, having done everything by the book up until this point, you must have felt desperation mixed with trepidation to extremes! You prepared us for things getting worse. I couldn't have imagined quite how bad, given the caring, family home setting he'd become accustomed to over those nine years. And all this occurring within a context of family issues and a back problem which, in its own way, is echoing the crisis you're now facing. Horrendous! Thanks, Wendy. My best wishes, Debbie
Comment Written 11-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2024
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Thank you Debbie. You understand perfectly the horror of this situation for me. I don't think I even registered that it could be classed as a kidnapping at the time. I greatly appreciate your encouraging and understanding words of support. Even just thinking about it again, to write it down, is very hard, reliving all those emotions. So the six stars are a great validation and an encouragement to tell his story. Thank you so much.
Wendy
Comment from T B Botts
Hello Wendy,
you have covered such a wide range of situations, creating such a diverse number of emotions in this post, that I don't know where to start. You've shown yourself once again to be an exceptional person, a caregiver with such a huge heart, and an empathetic woman able to see the need of someone who is unable to care for themselves, and meet that need. That the government is so inept and uncaring doesn't surprise me at all. I'm always surprised in this country that so many people want more government involvement in their lives, knowing full well they are incompetent. I think you're treating yourself unfairly in your assessment of yourself for believing that the government had Jonathon's best interest in mind. We all want to believe that others have some sense of caring. I'm sorry to hear that your daughter suffered so during this time. This post is so distressing in so many ways, and yet it gives me hope because there are people like you in this world. I probably won't like to see what you're going to write next, but I can't stop reading this. I have to know what happened. I hope you'll give yourself a break gal. You, of all people, deserve it.
Have a blessed day.
Tom
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2024
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Hello Wendy,
you have covered such a wide range of situations, creating such a diverse number of emotions in this post, that I don't know where to start. You've shown yourself once again to be an exceptional person, a caregiver with such a huge heart, and an empathetic woman able to see the need of someone who is unable to care for themselves, and meet that need. That the government is so inept and uncaring doesn't surprise me at all. I'm always surprised in this country that so many people want more government involvement in their lives, knowing full well they are incompetent. I think you're treating yourself unfairly in your assessment of yourself for believing that the government had Jonathon's best interest in mind. We all want to believe that others have some sense of caring. I'm sorry to hear that your daughter suffered so during this time. This post is so distressing in so many ways, and yet it gives me hope because there are people like you in this world. I probably won't like to see what you're going to write next, but I can't stop reading this. I have to know what happened. I hope you'll give yourself a break gal. You, of all people, deserve it.
Have a blessed day.
Tom
Comment Written 11-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2024
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Thank you so much Tom - and for the six beautiful stars as well, which are so much appreciated and valued. So encouraging. Prior to fostering, I'd never dealt with DOCS at all, and they had been pretty much absent for nine years, so I was definitely caught out by all this. Next chapter will be out soon, maybe tomorrow. I am glad you are engrossed by his story. Looking back I imagine no one else had these (and following) experiences, so it's a very different read. Thank you again.
Wendy
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
I'm trying to imagine how Jonathan must have felt during this time. Did he think you no longer loved him and abandoned him? The government (all of them) is certainly capable of screwing up, but this is a major screw-up, and involved a young man who had no idea what was going on.
Boy, I hope the next thing I read is not that you were arrested! I think I would have done the same. And who do you call when DOCS isn't doing their job?!
A shocking situation in this chapter, Wendy.
xo
Pam
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2024
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I'm trying to imagine how Jonathan must have felt during this time. Did he think you no longer loved him and abandoned him? The government (all of them) is certainly capable of screwing up, but this is a major screw-up, and involved a young man who had no idea what was going on.
Boy, I hope the next thing I read is not that you were arrested! I think I would have done the same. And who do you call when DOCS isn't doing their job?!
A shocking situation in this chapter, Wendy.
xo
Pam
Comment Written 11-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2024
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Thank you for your caring and insightful review. I had no idea what to do. Before fostering I'd had nothing to do with DOCS, so I had no idea of the types of things that were going on. I soon learned! It was a very stressful time.
Wendy
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Oh my goodness Wendy, Jonathan could have died without the proper care, how can a Government organisation do this to a disabled person? I am also very shocked and I am glad you stepped in and I hope things are going to improve from this point. He must have been confused and abandoned Wendy, this is an eye opener. A distressing post and I am glad you were there to rescue this poor guy, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2024
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Oh my goodness Wendy, Jonathan could have died without the proper care, how can a Government organisation do this to a disabled person? I am also very shocked and I am glad you stepped in and I hope things are going to improve from this point. He must have been confused and abandoned Wendy, this is an eye opener. A distressing post and I am glad you were there to rescue this poor guy, love Dolly x
Comment Written 11-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2024
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I fully expect he would have died, all alone. I'll post soon about what happened next. This was the start of a series of very difficult experiences. Thank you so much for the review, understanding and caring.
Wendy
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It is so difficult when the person cannot speak for themselves Wendy, I am glad Jonothan had you to care for him x
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I would have done the same thing. This entire system is a farce. The in the US is the same. I'm praying it worked out but am fearful.
and ticked the box that they were being looked after. (language difference?? We would say 'checked the box')
The next afternoon I received permission to leave my school early. (The following afternoon)
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2024
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I would have done the same thing. This entire system is a farce. The in the US is the same. I'm praying it worked out but am fearful.
and ticked the box that they were being looked after. (language difference?? We would say 'checked the box')
The next afternoon I received permission to leave my school early. (The following afternoon)
Comment Written 11-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2024
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Thank you so much for this understanding review. Yes, in Australia we always say "ticked the box", and thanks too for the other suggestion. I'll change it, although we in Australia would always say "next". I appreciate your careful and thoughtful reading a lot.
Wendy
Wendy
Comment from Verna Cole Mitchell
Wow! You really did learn in the worst way the governmental care for young people with disabilities in your location. I could feel the angst you and your family felt! What a shame that they didn't seem to care at all. I love your "Mama Bear" actions.
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2024
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Wow! You really did learn in the worst way the governmental care for young people with disabilities in your location. I could feel the angst you and your family felt! What a shame that they didn't seem to care at all. I love your "Mama Bear" actions.
Comment Written 11-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2024
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Thank you Verna. Yes, that was the hardest thing, to accept, that nobody cared enough to try to do what was right for him. Than you so much for reviewing.
Wendy
Comment from damommy
What a mess. No government agencies are to be blindly trusted, as you learned the hard way. I'm wondering what kind of trouble lay ahead of you. Don't keep me waiting too long.
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2024
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What a mess. No government agencies are to be blindly trusted, as you learned the hard way. I'm wondering what kind of trouble lay ahead of you. Don't keep me waiting too long.
Comment Written 11-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2024
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Thank you very much for your review. Yes, I learned the hard way - never having had anything much to do with government agencies before this. I am glad you're still reading and reviewing - thank you so much.
Wendy
Comment from Tom Horonzy
I know not how government works Down Under but it sounds as inefficient as ours Up Above. (Hey, I'd like to know if I originated that term). If not, how long have the States been so named?
As I see it, the government is not there to solve problems but to locate them, throw money towards a special interest group forever, hire people that would vote for the party initiating said programs and then leave it high and dry.it
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2024
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I know not how government works Down Under but it sounds as inefficient as ours Up Above. (Hey, I'd like to know if I originated that term). If not, how long have the States been so named?
As I see it, the government is not there to solve problems but to locate them, throw money towards a special interest group forever, hire people that would vote for the party initiating said programs and then leave it high and dry.it
Comment Written 11-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2024
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Thank you Tom. Governments around the world are filled with inefficiencies, and even despite these and other experiences here, I think our government is not too bad on the whole. Thank you for reviewing.
Wendy
Comment from Wayne Fowler
My word! How callous.
where were all the other DOCS-disabled people? Were there any at the motel needing rescued?
Very nicely written post.
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2024
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My word! How callous.
where were all the other DOCS-disabled people? Were there any at the motel needing rescued?
Very nicely written post.
Comment Written 11-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2024
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They were with foster-parents I imagine. I don't think any others were put into the motel, but of course who really knows? Such things would be kept quiet, and if there was no one willing to speak up ...
Thanks so much for reviewing.
Wendy