Dear Diary
A true story that occurred fifty years ago19 total reviews
Comment from Teri7
This is a very well written story in a poem you have penned about a love from long ago. I had a few of those too. You used very good words and very nice imagery from the art work you chose. Thanks for sharing. Blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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This is a very well written story in a poem you have penned about a love from long ago. I had a few of those too. You used very good words and very nice imagery from the art work you chose. Thanks for sharing. Blessings, Teri
Comment Written 30-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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I wasn?t one of your dalliances, was I? 😜
Comment from Richard Montfort Cary
Tom,
What a lovely sad poem of recollection... Easy to relate to... One for the books... Nicely structured free verse... Nice word choices... I had a very similar experience on a last kiss on an evening in my good ole '48 Plymouth with the rain streaming down the windshield with a street light shadowing our tears. Thanks for the Post.
Richard
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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Tom,
What a lovely sad poem of recollection... Easy to relate to... One for the books... Nicely structured free verse... Nice word choices... I had a very similar experience on a last kiss on an evening in my good ole '48 Plymouth with the rain streaming down the windshield with a street light shadowing our tears. Thanks for the Post.
Richard
Comment Written 30-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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Your welcome.
Once I was passed over she Avoided me I believe for she had feelings for me. Anyway, she ended up marrying ? go figure ? a to be preacher.
Comment from royowen
I am really sorry that things didn't work out, but sometimes it's genuinely for the best, I was jilted by the most beautiful girl a man could ever see, but I'm glad it did, on reflection it would probably ended in disaster, besides I met the best woman a a man could meet and had the best daughters I could have from that union. Beautifully written my friend blessings Roy
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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I am really sorry that things didn't work out, but sometimes it's genuinely for the best, I was jilted by the most beautiful girl a man could ever see, but I'm glad it did, on reflection it would probably ended in disaster, besides I met the best woman a a man could meet and had the best daughters I could have from that union. Beautifully written my friend blessings Roy
Comment Written 30-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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Wow. Your results are akin to mine. Forty-four years, but who?s counting.
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Bless you Tom
Comment from Sally Law
Someone propsed to me before Jackson and it was out of the blue. He was a dear friend. I was already in love with Jack, and responded so clumsily. I felt terrible and hurt him deeply. It's hard, but it must be a mutual love and affection.
I see you made out well with your wife. She looks to be your perfect match.
Sending you my best today as always.
Sal :))
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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Someone propsed to me before Jackson and it was out of the blue. He was a dear friend. I was already in love with Jack, and responded so clumsily. I felt terrible and hurt him deeply. It's hard, but it must be a mutual love and affection.
I see you made out well with your wife. She looks to be your perfect match.
Sending you my best today as always.
Sal :))
Comment Written 30-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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Yes and yes.
I think her love was mutual but Daddy stopped it soon enough not cause longing.
Comment from BethShelby
Nicely written and nostalgically sad. Parents have ended a lot of relationships over time and not always wisely. It was my dad 's inclination to end all of mine for me, but in the end, he wasn't able to have that kind of influence over me.
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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Nicely written and nostalgically sad. Parents have ended a lot of relationships over time and not always wisely. It was my dad 's inclination to end all of mine for me, but in the end, he wasn't able to have that kind of influence over me.
Comment Written 30-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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As always we share experiences.
Comment from Paul Manton
Hello again Tom.
Fifty years ago, I had a similar romance, with exactly the same result. Only three weeks ago, I dug her letters out of an old trunk, unopened for decades. I could not read them all. Even after all this time, the bittersweet memories were overpowering.
You have a couple (?) of unimportant fixes: I think the fourth line must contain 'bidding' (unless I misinterpreted it) - and the other is a mild suggestion: 'where' in verse 2 might be strengthened to 'whereas' ? One final maybe - in verse 3, you use the word 'hollow', which confused me; that may because the expression is American (I write to you from London) but if not, would the word 'transparent' be of use?
The contrast between the two of you is the body of the poem - and the resulting pain. If opposites attract, then polar opposites cannot be separated my time, distance or eternity - that is an indisoluble love - an unhealable wound for us, when star-crossed.
I'm sorry that I understand this story so well.
Paul
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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Hello again Tom.
Fifty years ago, I had a similar romance, with exactly the same result. Only three weeks ago, I dug her letters out of an old trunk, unopened for decades. I could not read them all. Even after all this time, the bittersweet memories were overpowering.
You have a couple (?) of unimportant fixes: I think the fourth line must contain 'bidding' (unless I misinterpreted it) - and the other is a mild suggestion: 'where' in verse 2 might be strengthened to 'whereas' ? One final maybe - in verse 3, you use the word 'hollow', which confused me; that may because the expression is American (I write to you from London) but if not, would the word 'transparent' be of use?
The contrast between the two of you is the body of the poem - and the resulting pain. If opposites attract, then polar opposites cannot be separated my time, distance or eternity - that is an indisoluble love - an unhealable wound for us, when star-crossed.
I'm sorry that I understand this story so well.
Paul
Comment Written 30-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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Hollow is sanctity borne.
I had whereas, paused and decided as written. Wrong. I?ll recheck biding. Thanks for the comments.
I did change biding to bidding on the basis she was doing so in her farewell.
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Very poignant, Tom, and clearly, it wasn't fiction. Heartache and deep sadness when you're young(ish) and unable to judge character and suitability. Very relatable too (a similar situation for me too and he was in the Navy). So you've touched an emotion. Take care Debbie
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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Very poignant, Tom, and clearly, it wasn't fiction. Heartache and deep sadness when you're young(ish) and unable to judge character and suitability. Very relatable too (a similar situation for me too and he was in the Navy). So you've touched an emotion. Take care Debbie
Comment Written 30-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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It wasn't easy for she was special.
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It wasn't easy for she was special.
Comment from JSD
Aww. A lovely little tale of broken love and lost relationship. Your free verse is well crafted and this is a sweet, wistful read. Thank you for sharing it.
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reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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Aww. A lovely little tale of broken love and lost relationship. Your free verse is well crafted and this is a sweet, wistful read. Thank you for sharing it.
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Comment Written 30-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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All wells, that ends well. I did right. Still found a gal ten years my junior at 29/19 who made me wait til she got her degree being the first in her clan to attend,
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A fond memory of yesteryear here Tom and she was a bit young for you perhaps and her father was afraid to let his baby girl go, I enjoyed your sad memory of when you parted, I dare say life improved for you after that anyway Tom, love Dolly x x x
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reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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A fond memory of yesteryear here Tom and she was a bit young for you perhaps and her father was afraid to let his baby girl go, I enjoyed your sad memory of when you parted, I dare say life improved for you after that anyway Tom, love Dolly x x x
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Comment Written 30-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2023
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It did, but you could not have convinced me at that moment.
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We always remember our heart being broken Tom x x x
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Guilt?