Heart Crafted Poems - 2022
Viewing comments for Chapter 73 "Survival Instincts"Musings of an old man - 2022
27 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
This is a good Cascade poem for the potlach. It provides a clear image of an extremely clingy person with the plant as a metaphor.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
  |
This is a good Cascade poem for the potlach. It provides a clear image of an extremely clingy person with the plant as a metaphor.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
Comment Written 13-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
-
Joan, thank you for your review
-
You're very welcome, Jim.
Joan
Comment from Regina Elliott
Very impressive cascade poem. The way you describe
first the nature scene, then the human scene about a
tight grip is clever. Have a
very creative and lovely
weekend. Blessings ~
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
|
Very impressive cascade poem. The way you describe
first the nature scene, then the human scene about a
tight grip is clever. Have a
very creative and lovely
weekend. Blessings ~
Comment Written 13-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
-
Regina, thank you!
Comment from Goodadvicechan
I like what you say, " Nature shows us the effort survival requires..."
We need to learn how nature survives. At the same time, we should enjoy nature as much as we can.
Thanks fir sharing.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
|
I like what you say, " Nature shows us the effort survival requires..."
We need to learn how nature survives. At the same time, we should enjoy nature as much as we can.
Thanks fir sharing.
Comment Written 13-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
-
Thank you!
Comment from Marienkiefer
I love the flow of alliteration, the T
Sparkling in your poem:
-You very effectively give the sense of the effort nature requires to survive and sustain itself.
-Great imagery and messaging obtained through use of this format and poetic device.
My favourite line: Nature shows us the effort survival requires.
It is so nice when readers can put two and two together with this kind of poem you have written, illustrating survival and determination.
Very well written.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
|
I love the flow of alliteration, the T
Sparkling in your poem:
-You very effectively give the sense of the effort nature requires to survive and sustain itself.
-Great imagery and messaging obtained through use of this format and poetic device.
My favourite line: Nature shows us the effort survival requires.
It is so nice when readers can put two and two together with this kind of poem you have written, illustrating survival and determination.
Very well written.
Comment Written 13-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
-
Marien, thank you for connecting the dots ...
Comment from Wendy G
Very nice! The tendrils indeed cling, and to survive they draw water from the surface they are on. I like the alliteration you employed as well as the cascading effect. Well done.
Wendy
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
|
Very nice! The tendrils indeed cling, and to survive they draw water from the surface they are on. I like the alliteration you employed as well as the cascading effect. Well done.
Wendy
Comment Written 13-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
-
Smiles back! Thank you, Wendy.
Comment from K.L. Rockquemore
I love this verse!
I was unfamiliar with this style of poetry until now, thanks for the exposure! :)
The repeated refrains are effective at looping the reader back to the beginning of the verse, strengthening the sentiment.
I appreciate the alliterations and metaphors.
The metre that was created felt like liquid flowing down the page.
Your word painting is excellent!
Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
|
I love this verse!
I was unfamiliar with this style of poetry until now, thanks for the exposure! :)
The repeated refrains are effective at looping the reader back to the beginning of the verse, strengthening the sentiment.
I appreciate the alliterations and metaphors.
The metre that was created felt like liquid flowing down the page.
Your word painting is excellent!
Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 12-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
-
K.L. Smiles back! Thank you,
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Your club response is in good form, JLR. Your repeated lines
worked well to carry the meaning from that of a clinging vine
to that of clinging lover/friend. I liked the way you formatted
the lines. Your poem had a great message. Great use of
alliteration
Thanks for participating.
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
|
Your club response is in good form, JLR. Your repeated lines
worked well to carry the meaning from that of a clinging vine
to that of clinging lover/friend. I liked the way you formatted
the lines. Your poem had a great message. Great use of
alliteration
Thanks for participating.
Comment Written 12-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
-
Smiles back! Thank you, Jan.
Comment from Verna Cole Mitchell
I enjoyed especially the alliteration in this poem of survival. You used this form of poetry with skill. One English teacher suggestion: In third stanza, it should be lovers or friends who clutch or friend or lover who clutches.
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
|
I enjoyed especially the alliteration in this poem of survival. You used this form of poetry with skill. One English teacher suggestion: In third stanza, it should be lovers or friends who clutch or friend or lover who clutches.
Comment Written 12-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
-
Verna, excellent input and thank you for your years of dedication to the youth in your world.
-
And thank you for your kind reply!
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Those vines have a habit of hanging onto whatever is in their path and can pull the mortar out of bricks and cause a house to all down as they are tenacious.
This is my favourite stanza showing their strength:
"Be cautious of such lovers or friends who clutches
such as consuming the air out of a balloon
like a bench vice's sharp teeth would grip a wood block!"
Much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
|
Those vines have a habit of hanging onto whatever is in their path and can pull the mortar out of bricks and cause a house to all down as they are tenacious.
This is my favourite stanza showing their strength:
"Be cautious of such lovers or friends who clutches
such as consuming the air out of a balloon
like a bench vice's sharp teeth would grip a wood block!"
Much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 12-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
-
Smiles back! Thank you, Dolly.
Comment from tempeste
Ciao poet!
this is an interesting topic that probably too many can connect to.
Love can definitely suffocate. There are people that cling onto their partner just like tiny tendrils that twist tightly on anything close by.
Love the analogy, even some friends latch onto a particular friend , it's not a healthy way to behave in any kind of relationship.
Keep safe!
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
|
Ciao poet!
this is an interesting topic that probably too many can connect to.
Love can definitely suffocate. There are people that cling onto their partner just like tiny tendrils that twist tightly on anything close by.
Love the analogy, even some friends latch onto a particular friend , it's not a healthy way to behave in any kind of relationship.
Keep safe!
Comment Written 12-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
-
Smiles back! Thank you!