The Challenge
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "The Challenge, Act 1, Scene 4"Young Man Has Doubts About Becoming a Priest
33 total reviews
Comment from Soledadpaz
Well done. Kept me enthralled. So Phillip doubts his sexuality, and he projects that doubt unto Arthur and tries to offer him a way out, when Arthur is comfortable with who he is. And now Phillip doubts his calling: if he becomes a priest. Sounds like he has a lot to work out and work through. And he's very lucky to have such a loyal friend.
Sol
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2021
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Well done. Kept me enthralled. So Phillip doubts his sexuality, and he projects that doubt unto Arthur and tries to offer him a way out, when Arthur is comfortable with who he is. And now Phillip doubts his calling: if he becomes a priest. Sounds like he has a lot to work out and work through. And he's very lucky to have such a loyal friend.
Sol
Comment Written 30-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2021
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Bless you, Sol! You cut through all the stage paint and finagled into the mental gears of the characters. Thank you for that. I love it when someone has discovered what is at its deepest level. You did all the work, then gave me the six stars! Imagine that!
Comment from Paulina Speaker
I was ABSOLUTELY drawn in from the beginning conversation. The detail amongst the two was amazing for character development and I felt the frustration with the characters which shows me the emotions were described very thoroughly- but in a way that wasn't over bearing.
I saw just a few spelling and grammatical errors - but it's very easy to do when the piece is decent sized!
Thank you for this incredible piece!
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2021
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I was ABSOLUTELY drawn in from the beginning conversation. The detail amongst the two was amazing for character development and I felt the frustration with the characters which shows me the emotions were described very thoroughly- but in a way that wasn't over bearing.
I saw just a few spelling and grammatical errors - but it's very easy to do when the piece is decent sized!
Thank you for this incredible piece!
Comment Written 30-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2021
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I welcome spelling and grammar corrections suggested, Pauline. I am a close editor. When something slips by me it's because I was asleep at the wheel. Don't worry about this one, but catches on any future readings will be appreciated. Thanks, meanwhile, for rewarding this one with your praise and that glorious six!
Comment from lancellot
Hmm, that is a lot of talking and a lot of emotional talking and introspection from two guys, gay or not. The writing and editing is well done. IU didn't see anything that stood out or needs correction.
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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Hmm, that is a lot of talking and a lot of emotional talking and introspection from two guys, gay or not. The writing and editing is well done. IU didn't see anything that stood out or needs correction.
Comment Written 29-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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Thank you for weighing in, Lance.
Comment from Jasmine Girl
This is a good scene when you described the hesitancy of Phillip's feeling toward Arthur. It's well done. I got a sense that Phillip is in love with Arthur more than with the girls which is why nothing happened back when he got attacked by the girls. But he is in denial about his feelings toward men. You did well in describing these ambivalent feeling in dialogues.
Phillip kept the magazine for three months before showing it to Arthur because he didn't want to hurt him?
I want to know more about the letter.
Exceptionally done.
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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This is a good scene when you described the hesitancy of Phillip's feeling toward Arthur. It's well done. I got a sense that Phillip is in love with Arthur more than with the girls which is why nothing happened back when he got attacked by the girls. But he is in denial about his feelings toward men. You did well in describing these ambivalent feeling in dialogues.
Phillip kept the magazine for three months before showing it to Arthur because he didn't want to hurt him?
I want to know more about the letter.
Exceptionally done.
Comment Written 29-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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I'm afraid I might have confused you about the letter, Ms. Girl (Or may I call you Jasmine?). The letter was the invitation to the celebration of his finishing seminary. A postscript to the letter was to invite Arthur to his house for a chat before the function. I really should have explained that. Especially in Arthur's case, since it otherwise sounds like a love letter, or at least flirty.
The fact that he had purchased the magazine three months earlier was indication to Arthur that Phillip's hidden motive might have been his consideration of having the sex-change operation.
Thank you, Jasmine (If that is your first name, it is very pretty, by the way).
Jay
Comment from Theodore McDowell
Great dialogue around a very tricky subject for Philip and Arthur as well as for the author. The dialogue captures that tension and awkwardness in a very realistic manner. Well done.
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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Great dialogue around a very tricky subject for Philip and Arthur as well as for the author. The dialogue captures that tension and awkwardness in a very realistic manner. Well done.
Comment Written 29-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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Thank you, Tim. Yes, it was difficult. I had hoped to explore the difference between being gay and being transexual. I've also wondered if a person who cross-dresses is gay. You know what I mean? Whether he (usually he) might dress in drag for entertainment, but not be gay. Is the voice they use in drag the same as they use not in drag? Anyway, I wanted to pursue those questions kind of as Phillip did. I mean, if a gay dude feels comfortable in women's clothing (and assuming the operation was perfected to the taking of a pill, or getting an injection, wouldn't gay men (if they truly felt gay) all become transexual? The scene failed in arriving at that conclusion.
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
Jay, you've done a wonderful job of looking into the inner conflicts of a man striving to reconcile two different, but somewhat connected experiences in his youth. He wants to become a priest, but struggles with these issues he's confronting. It will be interesting to see where your script goes.
Take care,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2021
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Jay, you've done a wonderful job of looking into the inner conflicts of a man striving to reconcile two different, but somewhat connected experiences in his youth. He wants to become a priest, but struggles with these issues he's confronting. It will be interesting to see where your script goes.
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment Written 28-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2021
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I honestly don't know where Phillip will take it next week. I take it from the position of a man being at a crossroad and let his responses to his environment lead the way. Thank you so much for the six stars,Rhonda!
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You?ve done a great job of portraying inner conflict. It takes many forms.
Take care
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hell0 Jay, my what an intense scene.
The dialogue was great
I'm wondering will be another scene that tells us readers that Phillip decides to do
Changes his six or becomes a priest
GREAT writing.
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2021
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Hell0 Jay, my what an intense scene.
The dialogue was great
I'm wondering will be another scene that tells us readers that Phillip decides to do
Changes his six or becomes a priest
GREAT writing.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2021
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Thank you, Gert. Like Phillip, I'm exploring options. I don't know yet what he'll decide. Thank you so much, though, for the six stars and your lovely words. I hope things are looking better, healthwise, with your husband.
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You are most welcome Jay
Gert
Comment from amahra
Wow, this story has really taken a turn. I didn't see this development o the story coming. Great dialogue with a realistic exchange between both characters.
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2021
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Wow, this story has really taken a turn. I didn't see this development o the story coming. Great dialogue with a realistic exchange between both characters.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2021
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Thank you, Amahra! He's got a challenge, that's for sure. Glad you stopped by and read it.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
This is so intense and believable. It rather explains Phillip's reaction to the girls. Accepting that one may lean toward homosexuality is terribly hard, I know from experience with a friend and a cousin. Both fought it for several years. Being a priest, sadly, doesn't fit with any kind of sexuality, so I understand his "if".
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2021
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This is so intense and believable. It rather explains Phillip's reaction to the girls. Accepting that one may lean toward homosexuality is terribly hard, I know from experience with a friend and a cousin. Both fought it for several years. Being a priest, sadly, doesn't fit with any kind of sexuality, so I understand his "if".
Comment Written 28-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2021
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Ah, good! I'm so glad you paused on that "if". It's crucial. Thank you for stopping by and for your kind words and twinklies. (I'm sounding like Arthur.)
Comment from Spitfire
This had me near tears. Your dialogue has captured the anguish of both men, one who is in denial of his desire for men and the other who embraces the same passion. Hopefully, the play will make homophobic readers and/or watchers that being 'different' doesn't make life easy.
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2021
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This had me near tears. Your dialogue has captured the anguish of both men, one who is in denial of his desire for men and the other who embraces the same passion. Hopefully, the play will make homophobic readers and/or watchers that being 'different' doesn't make life easy.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2021
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It makes me smile when I make someone cry, LOL, COL. Yes, I was exploring the acceptance and embracing of change. I'm sincerely touched that it moved you. I'm finding that your experience was not unlike many others here. Thank you Shari for your kindness and, of course, the six lovely stars.