Reviews from

Another Pretty Face

Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Chapter 1 Part one"
Can love survive small town gossip?

98 total reviews 
Comment from Begin Again
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Barbara,

This already sounds like a wonderful story of love,conflict, and learning what's right for yourself. I can't wait for the story to continue. Great job!

Carol

 Comment Written 23-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
    Thank you Carol, for the kind review. I appreciate your support.
Comment from c_lucas
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is very well written and has left several unanswed questions. It has a smooth flow of words, making for an easy read. There is very good imagery and descriptive scheme.

 Comment Written 23-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
    Thank you for your kind review and support. I appreciate the six stars.
reply by c_lucas on 23-Jun-2010
    You're welcome, Barbara. You earned the stars. Charlie
Comment from Belinda
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi, Barbara, this seems to be a promising opening for a book. Many things exposed, yet many more hidden, to be unfolded in your interesting chapters. (I assume by now you are well...)

 Comment Written 23-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
    I am still unable to use my ankle and it looks like a about 4 more weeks. Thank you for your kind review. I appreciate your continued support.
Comment from RazberryBullet
Excellent
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Got a chuckle here: "Boy, did you ever grow up!" "That's usually what happens as a person ages." ;p

Zinnnng!!! "I'm escorting Sara. How much are the tickets?"

suggestion: Joe's attention /when>went?/ straight to the voice

Liked how Joe 'turned off' Sarah ;p Good job!

 Comment Written 23-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
    I already fixed the when/went. I can't believe I did that. Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from bowls
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Well, you have me hooked already! Of course your readers will have to find out the identity of the father, and what happens in this relationship, and how the dance goes, and on and on. I enjoyed your relaxed style. There are a few typos I'd like to call to your attention. In the paragraph beginning JOE'S ATTENTION,you say WHEN straight instead of WENT STRAIGHT. In the paragraph beginning YOU GRADUATED, you have WAS SENT instead of WERE SENT. In the paragraph beginning SO SHE'S A TOMBOY, you have WAS UNDERFOOT with the subject YOU, instead of WERE.

 Comment Written 23-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
    I struggles with those was and were, because the singular is was, but when I read it, were sounded better. Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from suzzy
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

yes you did a good job introducing characters and still left me with a hook to know who the father of Sara's daughter is and is he the reason she left school besides she was pregnant-this is a good read-good first chapter

 Comment Written 23-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
    Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from bhogg
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

You really, really know how to spin a good tale! I'm anxious to follow this one. What a great start. Appeared to be well edited like all of your work. Written in a way where the reader can really zip through. You're so boring ... you always do a great job!

 Comment Written 23-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
    Thank you for your review, but I don't want to bore you. I want you to keep reading.
Comment from lola29
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Barbara, I really enjoyed this story. It seems everyone likes Joe Barnes, and before he can even exit his car, traffic is all around him. Didn't take him too long to notice Sara.

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 Comment Written 23-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
    Nope, he honed in on Sara immediately. Think sparks will fly? Thank you for your review.