Short
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "A Dance with Nancy"Shorter stories
13 total reviews
Comment from Earl Corp
I'm going to try to read all 95 short stories in this book but I know it will take some time. Good luck with this endeveavor. Thank you for sharing this with us.
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2022
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I'm going to try to read all 95 short stories in this book but I know it will take some time. Good luck with this endeveavor. Thank you for sharing this with us.
Comment Written 27-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2022
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Thanks, Earl.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
That is disgusting, Bill!!! LOL. I can understand why she left without him and went with Lance, lol, and he left with him mother. That says it all!!!
This book is going to be a laugh a minute, I can already see that! You used that sentence to start the story with, brilliantly! :)) Sandra
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2022
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That is disgusting, Bill!!! LOL. I can understand why she left without him and went with Lance, lol, and he left with him mother. That says it all!!!
This book is going to be a laugh a minute, I can already see that! You used that sentence to start the story with, brilliantly! :)) Sandra
Comment Written 27-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2022
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Thank you, Sandra. There is a mixed bag in this collection of long and short, happy and sad, horror and humor, and nonfiction and fiction.
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I'm already finding that out!! :))
Comment from nomi338
the inability to hold ones mucus within the confines of one's own body resulted in the expulsion of bodily fluids from another's body. This profusion of fluid flooding led to your being left alone at the dance, forced to await being scooped up by a parent and taken home to wash off someone else's waste. Sucks to be you.
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reply by the author on 03-Jun-2018
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the inability to hold ones mucus within the confines of one's own body resulted in the expulsion of bodily fluids from another's body. This profusion of fluid flooding led to your being left alone at the dance, forced to await being scooped up by a parent and taken home to wash off someone else's waste. Sucks to be you.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 03-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2018
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Thanks, nomi.
Comment from brenda faye curtis
I didn't know it was possible to cram so much alliteration into one tiny story! And what a well done story this is--you've perfectly captured the awkward agony of teenage titillation and regrettable results of attempted amore. Well done!
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2018
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I didn't know it was possible to cram so much alliteration into one tiny story! And what a well done story this is--you've perfectly captured the awkward agony of teenage titillation and regrettable results of attempted amore. Well done!
Comment Written 02-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2018
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Thank you, Brenda, for the terrific review. I did have fun with this challenge. Bill
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You're welcome, Bill.
Comment from Gloria ....
Ha, your sense of humour is unparalleled, Bill. No one and I mean no one can tell a story with such aplomb and grit all at the same time.
I chuckled all the way through and can imagine all the was snot as it should be.
Great job and best of luck with the contest.
Gloria
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2018
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Ha, your sense of humour is unparalleled, Bill. No one and I mean no one can tell a story with such aplomb and grit all at the same time.
I chuckled all the way through and can imagine all the was snot as it should be.
Great job and best of luck with the contest.
Gloria
Comment Written 01-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2018
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Thanks, Gloria.
Comment from lyenochka
Really poetic prose, Bill! I like all the alliteration, assonance and metaphorical language and the embarassing, hilarious situation fit well with the over-the-top language. It's so full of teen drama.
"and it's sound would sooth " (its....soothe)
reply by the author on 31-May-2018
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Really poetic prose, Bill! I like all the alliteration, assonance and metaphorical language and the embarassing, hilarious situation fit well with the over-the-top language. It's so full of teen drama.
"and it's sound would sooth " (its....soothe)
Comment Written 31-May-2018
reply by the author on 31-May-2018
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Good catch. I read that over a few times and missed it. The ?smoothe? I chalk up to writing it so seldom(ly). The ?its? is a universal spelling problem and is the scourge of authors, well, all through the universe.
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I know what you mean. Even when you type it correctly, sometimes Mr. Autocorrect changes it!
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
LOL! You blew your nose into your sweater? Why do I even talk to you? LOL! This is hilarious. Nancy, Yancy, and Lancy sound like Huey, Dewey, and Louie. Quack! :)
reply by the author on 31-May-2018
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LOL! You blew your nose into your sweater? Why do I even talk to you? LOL! This is hilarious. Nancy, Yancy, and Lancy sound like Huey, Dewey, and Louie. Quack! :)
Comment Written 31-May-2018
reply by the author on 31-May-2018
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Thanks, Phyllis. This was fun and probably semibiographical. (I?d be Lance). : )
Comment from judiverse
This is so cute. It reminds me of Booth Tarkington's story "Penrod" of several decades ago. Poor Penrod definitely did not want the go to the dance. The narrator is smitten with Nancy, but he has a slight problem. The poor boy has sniffling fits and when he has his big chance to dance with Nance, he has to blow his nose--on his sweater. Nance understandably vomits. Nancy left with Yancy's brother, so she surely wasn't too thrilled with Yancy as she left with his brother. The poor narrator has to wait for his mother. Maybe there was a bug going around? Great story, and good luck in the contest. judi
reply by the author on 31-May-2018
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This is so cute. It reminds me of Booth Tarkington's story "Penrod" of several decades ago. Poor Penrod definitely did not want the go to the dance. The narrator is smitten with Nancy, but he has a slight problem. The poor boy has sniffling fits and when he has his big chance to dance with Nance, he has to blow his nose--on his sweater. Nance understandably vomits. Nancy left with Yancy's brother, so she surely wasn't too thrilled with Yancy as she left with his brother. The poor narrator has to wait for his mother. Maybe there was a bug going around? Great story, and good luck in the contest. judi
Comment Written 31-May-2018
reply by the author on 31-May-2018
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I took a look at a piece from Penrod. He does seem a bit intense like Harry here.
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These events were forced on them by the parents. judi
Comment from Kerry Foley
lol, heh-heh-heh, This is hilarious, Bill. Oh, my goodness, I laughed so hard, every line of this had fantastic humor and alliteration. The alliteration most certainly added to the humor. It's a really cute story, lol. Well done! I wish you luck in the contest, it's so funny it has to do well:)) ~Kerry
reply by the author on 31-May-2018
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lol, heh-heh-heh, This is hilarious, Bill. Oh, my goodness, I laughed so hard, every line of this had fantastic humor and alliteration. The alliteration most certainly added to the humor. It's a really cute story, lol. Well done! I wish you luck in the contest, it's so funny it has to do well:)) ~Kerry
Comment Written 31-May-2018
reply by the author on 31-May-2018
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Thank you, Kerry, for recognizing the alliteration and occasional rhyming. Appreciate the positive review. Bill
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Thank you, Kerry, for recognizing the alliteration and occasional rhyming. Appreciate the positive review. Bill
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This speaks how author had a chance to dance with Nancy but it remained a chance merely, ultimately he could not at some uncivil act and Nancy had to leave with Lance; well said, well done. Keep Writing -- DR ALCREATOR
reply by the author on 31-May-2018
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This speaks how author had a chance to dance with Nancy but it remained a chance merely, ultimately he could not at some uncivil act and Nancy had to leave with Lance; well said, well done. Keep Writing -- DR ALCREATOR
Comment Written 31-May-2018
reply by the author on 31-May-2018
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Thanks, ALD
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Thanks, ALD