Vanished
a free verse23 total reviews
Comment from Mark Valentine
Wow! This poem hits home in a big way with those of us of a certain age (57, in my case). I can so relate to wanting to desperately hold on to the best of that age, and the best of who I was at that age. The little examples you use - like the neighbor with a snowblower offering to clear your walk, are perfectly chosen to illustrate the little things that we may have lost. And the big examples you use (like London bridge) tie together how the little things and the big things seem to be part of the same dynamic.
This one is haunting, sad, and beautiful.
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Wow! This poem hits home in a big way with those of us of a certain age (57, in my case). I can so relate to wanting to desperately hold on to the best of that age, and the best of who I was at that age. The little examples you use - like the neighbor with a snowblower offering to clear your walk, are perfectly chosen to illustrate the little things that we may have lost. And the big examples you use (like London bridge) tie together how the little things and the big things seem to be part of the same dynamic.
This one is haunting, sad, and beautiful.
Comment Written 06-Jul-2017
Comment from jlsavell
Dearest Dawn,
What a line up. I do apologize. I have not one six. This work is truly exceptional. It actually bought tears to my eyes. If we could all go back to a time such as this. Beautiful work. As always. Best wishes with the contest.. Jimi
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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Dearest Dawn,
What a line up. I do apologize. I have not one six. This work is truly exceptional. It actually bought tears to my eyes. If we could all go back to a time such as this. Beautiful work. As always. Best wishes with the contest.. Jimi
Comment Written 05-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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Ah, Jimi, you have such a big heart - thank you for a most wonderful review, my friend! *sigh*...yes, if only we could go back... I really do believe we have lost much of our humanity in these times...
Comment from Ulla
Awe, Dawn, I so wished I had a six for you for this beautiful poem describing the sad world we live in today. What has it all come to? It's a beautiful composition. We grew up in piece and now this is delivered on our children's' doorstep. You use so beautiful words. All the best. Ulla:)xx
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Awe, Dawn, I so wished I had a six for you for this beautiful poem describing the sad world we live in today. What has it all come to? It's a beautiful composition. We grew up in piece and now this is delivered on our children's' doorstep. You use so beautiful words. All the best. Ulla:)xx
Comment Written 06-Jun-2017
Comment from Ricky1024
I think Dawn that we lose a little piece of us each day.
His does to college, spite dies, car accident and we can no longer drive.
You piece talked about going back...
But that died too
Nice....
Ricky 1024.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
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I think Dawn that we lose a little piece of us each day.
His does to college, spite dies, car accident and we can no longer drive.
You piece talked about going back...
But that died too
Nice....
Ricky 1024.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
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Thanks very much.
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Your welcome.
Ricky...
Comment from Asem.inspirations
My goodness Dawn:
Now you have me nearly in tears what a heart touching, heart tugging poem. I totally am in agreement with your every word and in love with this piece. How splendid the music, It sets the tone for this beautiful poetry ballet. I can see this being performed on a stage with dancers and live orchestra playing the violins...Marvelous.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
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My goodness Dawn:
Now you have me nearly in tears what a heart touching, heart tugging poem. I totally am in agreement with your every word and in love with this piece. How splendid the music, It sets the tone for this beautiful poetry ballet. I can see this being performed on a stage with dancers and live orchestra playing the violins...Marvelous.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
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Thanks very much.
Comment from Joan E.
You had me at the "squirrel" simile and cemented the connection with the "sacred tree" metaphor and the idea of your "redemption". Your reference to the President was choice as was the evocative picture. I want to go back to the time when the customer was always right! Your echo of the nursery rhyme was sobering as well. Big sighs- Joan
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
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You had me at the "squirrel" simile and cemented the connection with the "sacred tree" metaphor and the idea of your "redemption". Your reference to the President was choice as was the evocative picture. I want to go back to the time when the customer was always right! Your echo of the nursery rhyme was sobering as well. Big sighs- Joan
Comment Written 06-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
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Thanks very much.
Comment from doggymad
Wonderful poem Dawn and one that carries a strong message. I feel sad for the next generation if this is how the world will continue to progress/regress.
Too much brutality in the name of religion
hugs
Freda
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
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Wonderful poem Dawn and one that carries a strong message. I feel sad for the next generation if this is how the world will continue to progress/regress.
Too much brutality in the name of religion
hugs
Freda
Comment Written 05-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
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Thanks very much.
Comment from Jay Squires
Ah, Dawn, you had me at the selfie. LOL, you DID write a cogent think piece, though. We can't all say when that honest, innocent part of ourselves has vanished, though most, when we cast our minds back to our near or distant past, we likely remember when those gentler days were, but don't remember when it vanished. Some might say we're just getting old. But it's something more, isn't it?
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2017
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Ah, Dawn, you had me at the selfie. LOL, you DID write a cogent think piece, though. We can't all say when that honest, innocent part of ourselves has vanished, though most, when we cast our minds back to our near or distant past, we likely remember when those gentler days were, but don't remember when it vanished. Some might say we're just getting old. But it's something more, isn't it?
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2017
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LOL. No, we can't say, but I think it happens before we get much beyond childhood, at least for most of us.What a shame...
Thanks so much, Jay.
Comment from smerryman3
Fantastic poem! The combination of the picture and the title are what first drew me in and the full poem did not dissapoint. Excuse my ignorance (I am not well versed at interpreting poetry) but is the "I" referring to humanity/human decency ("the nugget more precious than gold") or is the "I" referring to the narrator's feeling of invisibilty as the world grows crueler and more impersonal? Or are neither interpretations correct?
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2017
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Fantastic poem! The combination of the picture and the title are what first drew me in and the full poem did not dissapoint. Excuse my ignorance (I am not well versed at interpreting poetry) but is the "I" referring to humanity/human decency ("the nugget more precious than gold") or is the "I" referring to the narrator's feeling of invisibilty as the world grows crueler and more impersonal? Or are neither interpretations correct?
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2017
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Thanks very much.
Comment from lalajovanoski
This is a really great free verse. I loved all your references, and even wish I could join you in going back to those times. I can relate to this, looking back and realizing those good times and longing for them. Thanks for sharing â?¡â?¡
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
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This is a really great free verse. I loved all your references, and even wish I could join you in going back to those times. I can relate to this, looking back and realizing those good times and longing for them. Thanks for sharing â?¡â?¡
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
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Thanks very much.