The Scent of Darkness
Short Story-Missed prompt!23 total reviews
Comment from l.raven
OK Who's sicker...you or I ???? because I know it's you....I'm LMAO....Jerry the bucktooth idiot...sounds like Bards brother...you kill me Michael...this is amazing you nut...I love ya...Luff Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2014
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OK Who's sicker...you or I ???? because I know it's you....I'm LMAO....Jerry the bucktooth idiot...sounds like Bards brother...you kill me Michael...this is amazing you nut...I love ya...Luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 02-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2014
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Lucky for the gals I'm married... Hahaha. But, Pooooor Donna! She's used to me. She doesn't bat an eye anymore. Maybe I'll have Jerry show up at Caesar's... mikey
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She sounds like a wonderful wife Michael...you are both lucky to have each other...later you...Luff ya Linda
Comment from seaglass
Great writing Mikey. This started out so tender my thought was "this Dude know women" then the clever way of unloading the pest and my thought was, "Wow! that's a come-on I never encountered." Then everything went so dark so fast. Great writing.
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2014
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Great writing Mikey. This started out so tender my thought was "this Dude know women" then the clever way of unloading the pest and my thought was, "Wow! that's a come-on I never encountered." Then everything went so dark so fast. Great writing.
Comment Written 30-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2014
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I'm so pleased you liked this. That was exactly the effect I was going for. I needed a little novel break. It seemed easy to write something short now! Thank you so much! Love all the stars!! mikey
Comment from pattipac
WOW,Mikey, you do have a evil shadow lurking behind your gentle demeanor. Waiting, patiently waiting, to pounce on your unsuspecting lady-friend.
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
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WOW,Mikey, you do have a evil shadow lurking behind your gentle demeanor. Waiting, patiently waiting, to pounce on your unsuspecting lady-friend.
Comment Written 30-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
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A good thing I'm too lazy to leave my room and computer! Another benefit of FanStory addiction, it keeps the deranged off the streets. So delighted you enjoyed. Thanks for all the stars!! mikey
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LOL
Comment from GracieAnn
Mikey, indeed, the others who entered dodged a bulls eye shot from your pen. This is creepy and describes a psychopath in engaging terms. Creative, unique, and captivating. Well done. my friend. :0 GracieAnn
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
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Mikey, indeed, the others who entered dodged a bulls eye shot from your pen. This is creepy and describes a psychopath in engaging terms. Creative, unique, and captivating. Well done. my friend. :0 GracieAnn
Comment Written 30-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
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Hi. I'm so pleased that you enjoyed this. My wife read this and has been looking at me funny. The more I tell her "I made it up" the more uneasy she gets!! Thank you so much. mikey
Comment from Sankey
Wow where is this headed huh! Is there more coming? Creepy! Will stick with it for a while anyway.
No Spags shock horror huh!
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
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Wow where is this headed huh! Is there more coming? Creepy! Will stick with it for a while anyway.
No Spags shock horror huh!
Comment Written 30-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
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Just a short story. Heading to jail probably!! I actually spent time editing for a change. Hahaha.
Comment from CR Delport
A lucky break for them indeed :) This is well written and Lance's actions are described very well. (And his dodgy intentions). Good job.
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
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A lucky break for them indeed :) This is well written and Lance's actions are described very well. (And his dodgy intentions). Good job.
Comment Written 30-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
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Thank you. I keep trying to write something scary! Getting better. mikey
Comment from Spitfire
Excellent portrait of a psychopath whose urge to murder is triggered by fear. Now see, this is the very reason I don't trust good-looking charming men. :-)
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
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Excellent portrait of a psychopath whose urge to murder is triggered by fear. Now see, this is the very reason I don't trust good-looking charming men. :-)
Comment Written 29-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
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I knew I should be pleased that I lost my looks!! mikey
Comment from Antoine Charlemaine
Oh, come on Michael! It isn't that bad! Actually, I rather enjoyed the suspense that you manage to build as the story progresses. I feel sorry for Jerry...and end up feeling pity for Maria. You bastard! Yep! You evoked an emotion, alright. Therefore your little yarn is a success. Well done. Anthony.
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
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Oh, come on Michael! It isn't that bad! Actually, I rather enjoyed the suspense that you manage to build as the story progresses. I feel sorry for Jerry...and end up feeling pity for Maria. You bastard! Yep! You evoked an emotion, alright. Therefore your little yarn is a success. Well done. Anthony.
Comment Written 29-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
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Cool! Glad it evoked something. Thank you kindly. Mikey
Comment from Max Edon
I thought that this was a very creepy little story. I enjoyed it so much that I read it several times. I might like to see this story as a longer work. Lance is quite a character.
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2014
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I thought that this was a very creepy little story. I enjoyed it so much that I read it several times. I might like to see this story as a longer work. Lance is quite a character.
Comment Written 29-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2014
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That's a good idea. Perhaps I'll do a longer piece with him. What a great review. I appreciate it. Six stars too! Thank you very much. Sorry to be late in replying, mikey
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You are welcome
Comment from nordicgirl
Too bad you missed the prompt. This had a great chance. Everything implied but chilling and terrifying nonetheless. Great character development. The fact that the characters were so ordinary added to the chills. Excellent!! NG
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2014
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Too bad you missed the prompt. This had a great chance. Everything implied but chilling and terrifying nonetheless. Great character development. The fact that the characters were so ordinary added to the chills. Excellent!! NG
Comment Written 29-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2014
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Thank you so much. I am delighted you enjoyed this. Mikey