To Cherish Thorns
Viewing comments for Chapter 46 "Another Winter"Free Verse Poetry
19 total reviews
Comment from Patti R.
Baring a bit of your spiritual side, nicely written free verse here Michael. I loved the image produced by 'in patterns designed by playful angels'
And just so ya know, more than a foot of snow fell here last night and yesterday - the kids were so pissed when the school bus made it out here, ha!
Snow is a beautiful thing, unless you're trying to drive through it.
Patti
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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Baring a bit of your spiritual side, nicely written free verse here Michael. I loved the image produced by 'in patterns designed by playful angels'
And just so ya know, more than a foot of snow fell here last night and yesterday - the kids were so pissed when the school bus made it out here, ha!
Snow is a beautiful thing, unless you're trying to drive through it.
Patti
Comment Written 28-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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ha! I know. Those of you folks buried in snow aren't so in love with it. like me reading an ode to desert sand!! but, I see snow once in a blue moon. so, a big thrill for me! but, true for a little nice dusting correct? mikey
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oh absolutely! or wind-carved drifts that freeze and last for weeks!
Comment from ravenblack
And I take snow for granted...And curse and grab the shovel. Here in the Midwest, snow is far too familiar. I would love to see it for the first time with the eyes of a poet. How the flakes must have danced! No wonder you did not get cold. "Foiling gravity' s stern admonitions/ with but the softest chuckle/ and wink"- great line. But here, when they collect all slushy by the shovel-full , they laugh diabolically.
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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And I take snow for granted...And curse and grab the shovel. Here in the Midwest, snow is far too familiar. I would love to see it for the first time with the eyes of a poet. How the flakes must have danced! No wonder you did not get cold. "Foiling gravity' s stern admonitions/ with but the softest chuckle/ and wink"- great line. But here, when they collect all slushy by the shovel-full , they laugh diabolically.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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I forget that some people are buried in snow. hahaha. I only see snow like every three years or so. I guess I wouldn't love a poem about desert sand all that much! mikey
Comment from w.j.debi
What a wonderful perspective on winter. It usually gets depicted as cold and cruel. That last stanza is so descriptive. The ending is inspirational...
that this is where the Lord
comes to play
with me.
It is why I am not cold.
With the Lord, it is not possible to be cold. Excellent write. Thank you for sharing your creation.
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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What a wonderful perspective on winter. It usually gets depicted as cold and cruel. That last stanza is so descriptive. The ending is inspirational...
that this is where the Lord
comes to play
with me.
It is why I am not cold.
With the Lord, it is not possible to be cold. Excellent write. Thank you for sharing your creation.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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glad you liked it. I don't see too much winter so I am a big fan. wonderful comments and insights. thank you kindly, mikey
Comment from Lovinia
Hi michael
This is quite lovely. A unique way to think of snow and the winter. feel like this about snow, as a visitor, or as you ay, once every three years or so. I have been to the ski slopes a couple of time and I loved all that crisp whiteness .... always had good weather. i can also imagine snuggling up on a sled ride or by a warm log fire while a blizzard rages outside. Well, thats enough snow for me ... I hate the danger of driving and walking in it, or be caught out and so cold. :)))
Otherwise you poem is like a lovely vacation dream for me. I enjoy your free verse and the smooth flow. The presentation is fantastic - that image is superb. The first verse is outstanding, such endearing phrasing. Soft and gentle near rhyme is like an echo - "applaud/fall/cradle/resolve". I love the illusion of spring and summer as you dance outside in the falling snow with a "chuckle and a wink".
Great contrasting the summer and spring and I love this phrase - "frolicking carefree in the abundance of plenty."
Another favourite line - "dancing and darting and floating" - I wonder if elipse might work better than the double "and". I do understand you are using the and as pause lengtheners ... does the same thing. :))) Same thing with "as spring and summer and fall," - just thinking aloud ... up to you. I have enjoyed my little frolic in the snow very much, now ready to go back into our lovely spring weather. Well written. Warm Regards - Lovinia xoxoxox
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2013
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Hi michael
This is quite lovely. A unique way to think of snow and the winter. feel like this about snow, as a visitor, or as you ay, once every three years or so. I have been to the ski slopes a couple of time and I loved all that crisp whiteness .... always had good weather. i can also imagine snuggling up on a sled ride or by a warm log fire while a blizzard rages outside. Well, thats enough snow for me ... I hate the danger of driving and walking in it, or be caught out and so cold. :)))
Otherwise you poem is like a lovely vacation dream for me. I enjoy your free verse and the smooth flow. The presentation is fantastic - that image is superb. The first verse is outstanding, such endearing phrasing. Soft and gentle near rhyme is like an echo - "applaud/fall/cradle/resolve". I love the illusion of spring and summer as you dance outside in the falling snow with a "chuckle and a wink".
Great contrasting the summer and spring and I love this phrase - "frolicking carefree in the abundance of plenty."
Another favourite line - "dancing and darting and floating" - I wonder if elipse might work better than the double "and". I do understand you are using the and as pause lengtheners ... does the same thing. :))) Same thing with "as spring and summer and fall," - just thinking aloud ... up to you. I have enjoyed my little frolic in the snow very much, now ready to go back into our lovely spring weather. Well written. Warm Regards - Lovinia xoxoxox
Comment Written 27-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2013
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Oh yeah, elipse. very cool. I like that. I am not good at punctuation so, I am shy with it. I never used it till I found this site. now I am trying to a bit. I am never quite sure what is correct or not. This is such a wonderful review to read. I am just so appreciative of the compliments and acknowledgement. Walking on air with silly smiles. I may do a cartwheel. you are most kind. Must go do some elipsing, mikey
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Hi mikey
I always put in too many commas or not enough. :))) I do love using elipses .... just saves me having to think of the correct punctuation or grammar. With help from reviewers I have learned heaps about spag. Though I do love free verse and the minimal punctuation. Hehehe! Glad you are doing cartwheels and elipsing ... I enjoyed your write so much. Hugs - Lovi xoxoxo
Comment from l.raven
Oh Michael, This is just beautiful...Winter is truly my favorite season...The snow is so very beautiful...And I love so love the way you describe it...It is a miracle of God ...A wonderful write...Luff ya Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2013
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Oh Michael, This is just beautiful...Winter is truly my favorite season...The snow is so very beautiful...And I love so love the way you describe it...It is a miracle of God ...A wonderful write...Luff ya Linda xxoo
Comment Written 27-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2013
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so glad you like it. some of the more snow bound folks have their doubts. hahaha. I guess I wouldn't be thrilled with a piece about the desert. but, I hardly ever see snow and it brings out the little kid in me. I want to make a snowman! mikey
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Hi Mikey, I know how you feel...I make snow angels with the grandkids each year, and build snowmen...LOL...
Comment from country ranch writer
I LOVE THE FIRST SNOW OF THE YEAR AS EVERYTHING LOOKS LIKE A FAIRY TALE SO CRISP AND WHITE. CHILDREN PLAY IN IT AND NEVER SEEM TO FEEL THE COLD AS THEY ARE RUNNING AND PLAYING AND HAVING SO MUCH FUN. I MISS THE SNOW
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2013
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I LOVE THE FIRST SNOW OF THE YEAR AS EVERYTHING LOOKS LIKE A FAIRY TALE SO CRISP AND WHITE. CHILDREN PLAY IN IT AND NEVER SEEM TO FEEL THE COLD AS THEY ARE RUNNING AND PLAYING AND HAVING SO MUCH FUN. I MISS THE SNOW
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2013
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I so rarely see snow that I and my wife too are like little kids. the neighbors think we are crazy. hahaha. once every two or three years where I live. mikey
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my husband being a fla boy never seen snow, my daughter her taste of snowy weather when she was in the army for a bit, my oldest son goes to the mountains in the blue ridge so his kids can see the snow and my youngest boy and his bunch went to Chicago one year so their kids could play in the snow and visit the grandparents on her side of the family
Comment from krys123
Thank you very much Mike for sharing this well formatted and thought provoking poem withstands, myself and other readers/writers. I especially like the way you format the written word on a page as it rocks back and forth and flows so easily downward. You thought of winter is an amusing one at that and you give it credibility after the Lord's summer days. You have a good one and God bless.
AK
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
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Thank you very much Mike for sharing this well formatted and thought provoking poem withstands, myself and other readers/writers. I especially like the way you format the written word on a page as it rocks back and forth and flows so easily downward. You thought of winter is an amusing one at that and you give it credibility after the Lord's summer days. You have a good one and God bless.
AK
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
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So glad you liked this. It is amusing that I forgot how some of the folks reading this undergo pretty severe winters and aren't as in love with it as I am. hahaha. but they have been pretty kind so far. I don't suppose I would be that fond of an ode to the desert either! of course, I see snow once every two or three years so it is a novelty for me. glad you liked it. thank you kindly. blessings, mikey
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You are so welcome Mikey
Comment from adewpearl
Effective personification of Winter
good alliteration in solemnly spent solitude silently
more good alliteration follows
steely-eyed resolve - add the hyphen
I love the relentless rain and the haughty, hell-bent hail
and the floating, dancing, winking snowflakes
You almost made me forget how very much I detest snow, which looks so pretty coming down and coating the ground before it creates a huge, dangerous nuisance. LOL :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
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Effective personification of Winter
good alliteration in solemnly spent solitude silently
more good alliteration follows
steely-eyed resolve - add the hyphen
I love the relentless rain and the haughty, hell-bent hail
and the floating, dancing, winking snowflakes
You almost made me forget how very much I detest snow, which looks so pretty coming down and coating the ground before it creates a huge, dangerous nuisance. LOL :-) Brooke
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
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I suppose it would be like someone convincing me to love the sand in this desert. ha! I am pleased that you enjoyed the writing and so very hopeful you won't be thinking of me when you are shoveling snow!! mikey
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
That is really lovely, Michael. I love the winter, when the frost crinkles the fallen leaves and the snow makes even the ugliest look beautiful. Every season has a reason to be, and I love them all. xsx Sandra
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
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That is really lovely, Michael. I love the winter, when the frost crinkles the fallen leaves and the snow makes even the ugliest look beautiful. Every season has a reason to be, and I love them all. xsx Sandra
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
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I love them all too. But, I really adore winter. I suppose that not having to suffer through harsh winters is a factor. ha! Glad you liked this one. thank you, mikey
Comment from TAB_that's me
Great winter poem. I just dread winter -I live in Nebraska where it is cold and we often have snow. The older I get the less I like it. I love the ending to this Mikey.
~teresa~
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
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Great winter poem. I just dread winter -I live in Nebraska where it is cold and we often have snow. The older I get the less I like it. I love the ending to this Mikey.
~teresa~
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
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ha! I am getting a lot of that from folks that are buried in snow!! I guess too much of a good thing huh. I have seen snow maybe three times so, a big thrill for me! glad you like the poem though. nice to read by a roaring fireplace. mikey