Comment from seren james

Excellent

Now this one is a real cacophony! You have done very well here. The words of the sounds, your onomatopoeia are excellent.
I have a 2yr old grandson so I know exactly what it is like. I'll change the name to Harri and sing it to him.

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2012

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2012

Thank you - Yes kids love to hear their name in a poem and you can imagine a child enjoying the noise in this one.
I suspect you may have voted for the poem, too, and possibly it was your vote that pushed it over the line - to the disgust of my friend Lee (Humpwhistle) who looked to have it in the bag until the last moment.
Steve

Comment from joann r romei

Excellent

Cute, I have three sons and I loved when they played with the pots, I never minded their creative noises, yet hated any toy sounds.

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2012

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2012

Thanks - I am pretty sure most parents are familiar with the pot cupboard routine.
Steve

Comment from adewpearl

Excellent

strong rhyming couplets
excellent use of onomatopoeia
good alliteration in phrases like times ten
good assonance of short U sounds in drum and gun
good internal rhyme in crashing and splashing
What a fun scene you have created with a great appeal to the sense of sound - love the humor, too :-) Brooke

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2012

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2012

Thank you, Brooke. Memories of my own two noisy boys helped!
Steve

Comment from notdeadyet

Excellent

You have a budding drummer. I liked all the noise words you made up. I also like the rhyme and meter. You did a good job.

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2012

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2012

Thank you. I was amazed to see your 'orchestra tuning up' piece languishing near the bottom of the voting - it deserved better - you did a good job of portraying the sound of each instrument - mind you, Stravinsky is cacophony on his own!

reply by notdeadyet on 13-Sep-2012

Yes, I was amazed, too. It got lots of good reviews- go figure! Look at my "Variation on the Worm song" for a humorous look at the situation.

reply by the author on 13-Sep-2012

Love the worm song (and your variation of course)
One day somebody will turn on the tap and the votes will flow. Took me a while to win my first contest and now I'm pretty good at targeting ones where I will do well - the minds of the voters are still a mystery however.
Steve

Comment from elliejean

Excellent

I love the picture. I love the poem. It brings back fond and not so fond memories of my kids playing in the kitchen. I had more laughs than groans. Great work.

 Comment Written 11-Sep-2012

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2012

Thank you, ej
Steve

Comment from Charlene0513

Excellent

A superbly well crafted Cacophony poem with all the clatters and bangs you managed to make it feel as if you were in the room yourself.
Great descriptive words and it had its own tune that was in time with the words.
Well done.
Charlene

 Comment Written 11-Sep-2012

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2012

Thank you, Charlene.
Steve

Comment from RYME4U

Excellent

Very well done!This is very descriptive and the imagery is vivid. Your cacophony sounds are very good and the picture is a great match. Good job!

 Comment Written 11-Sep-2012

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2012

Thank you.
Steve

Comment from missy98writer

Excellent

Poet,
Your Cacophony poem is excellently written with rich imagery.
The art work is adorable you used.
I can hear the jarring sounds of your words.
Your rhyme is very good.
You used great metaphors.
I enjoyed the second stanza:
A roar and a howl and a squeak and a moo,
Timothy's starting his own private zoo.
Ker-ching and Ker-chow and a rat-a-tat-tat
Timothy's shooting the baddies like that.
I wish you good luck in the contest.
I'd recommend your poem to other reviewers.
Missy.

 Comment Written 11-Sep-2012

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2012

Thanks, Missy - glad you enjoyed my noisy poem.
Steve

Comment from ennahanid

Excellent

How nice that Timothy, a drummer in the making and so noisy and annoying and fun at the same time. I enjoyed reading your entry for this contest and I wish you luck - Dinah

 Comment Written 11-Sep-2012

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2012

Thanks, Dinah. The good luck wishes worked.
Steve

Comment from Carrie Carson

Excellent

Yes, they just have to act their age, don't they?

Love the rhythm and rhyme in this, creative use Ker ching and Ker chow and rat a tat tat.

Good luck in the contest. Great image for this, too. :) Carrie

 Comment Written 11-Sep-2012

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2012

Thanks, Carrie.
Loolks like the good luck wishes worked.
Steve

reply by Carrie Carson on 13-Sep-2012

CONGRATULATIONS!! Once in a while, my choice wins...so glad this one did, great job.

Certainly, you're welcome. :) Carrie