Reviews from

Another Pretty Face

Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Chapter 3 Part One"
Can love survive small town gossip?

74 total reviews 
Comment from Helen Tan
Excellent
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Hi, and 'bye Mr. Joe
Is the single quote mark meant to be in front of "bye"?

"I wonder what tonight's reunion will bring. I'm sure it will be interesting."
I think there will be some hot happenings. My only fear is that something is going to happen to Cassie. I guess it's the information you gave on Angela and their text messaging.

Onto the next chapter to find out...

 Comment Written 27-Jul-2010


reply by the author on 28-Jul-2010
    Thank you for continuing to follow my posts. I am sorry you weren't able to read whent their were bonus points attached.
reply by Helen Tan on 28-Jul-2010
    Don't worry about the $$$$ - I don't review based on $$$$. Anyway I don't intend to post anything for a while - catching up on my other assignment.
Comment from afternoonlight
Excellent
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You have the romantic tension going, and the prom coming up, the handsome guy leaving, and everyone reved up and hot! I'm moving on to the next chapter with anticipation

 Comment Written 25-Jul-2010


reply by the author on 25-Jul-2010
    Thank you for you kind review. I appreciate it.
Comment from marcii
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This was a good prelude to what im guessing is an eventual getting together of these two or in their minds at least.
Well written, keeping the readers interest,though I admit I was hoping for more,but that's perhaps me rushing things.
Marcii

 Comment Written 18-Jul-2010


reply by the author on 18-Jul-2010
    Thank you for reading back. I appreciate it.
Comment from Ann Smith
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

As usual, your words flow across the page easily. I like the details and the dialogue, because it was lighthearted and fun with energy added in the jog. I wonder what tonight's reunion will bring as well. ann

 Comment Written 17-Jul-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jul-2010
    Thank you for your kind review and continued support.
reply by Ann Smith on 17-Jul-2010
    You are welcome. ann
Comment from fishcantswim
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Another extremely well-written chapter.

All dialogue is sound and believable.

The chapter is nicely paced and continues character and relationship development.

No SPAG to report, as far as I could see.

Keep up the good work!

 Comment Written 17-Jul-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jul-2010
    Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Rain Chapman
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hello Barbara,

I liked this chapter, the interaction between them is becoming more relaxed, the attraction is strong, and I can't wait to see how these two come together with all of that distance in miles where they live. One thing for you to peek at.

He wore a light gray athletic T-shirt, and she couldn't help but notice muscle definition.

Sara noticed his dancing brown eyes slide down her body. - notice and noticed are very close together here, maybe change one?

Take care,
Rain :^)

 Comment Written 17-Jul-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jul-2010
    I will make that correction. Thank you for noticing it. I appreciate your kind review.
Comment from judelesemann
Excellent
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Great narrative. I would like to see a little more physical description of Joe. What you've written is good. It is such an easy read. Look forward to more chapters. Well done. Be blessed, Jude

 Comment Written 17-Jul-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jul-2010
    Some of Joe's description has already been given. I have sort of done it in pieces. Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Auroraboreal800
Excellent
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Hello Barbara!
This is amazing how you created an interesting and beautiful chapter out of something so simple like this:

"What are you doing?" She rested her head against the doorframe.

"I'm stretching." While he touched his shoes, he added, "Last night you mentioned you jog to work."


Very well done!

 Comment Written 17-Jul-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jul-2010
    Thank you for your kind review and continued support.
Comment from Donovan
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I am not sure I want to read any story about someone that can stretch and touch their shoes. I got a shoe shine the other day and just had to take the guy's word for it.

 Comment Written 17-Jul-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jul-2010
    Oh dear, what am I going to do with you? I shall enjoy your very interesting reviews.
Comment from Monte Carbolic
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

From the fast-paced story to the great dialogue, this is an ezceptional chapter. I am pretty sure I am new to this story, but that didn't keep me from following along. I look forward to reading more of this. You have earned yourself a new fan.

 Comment Written 16-Jul-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jul-2010
    Thank you for your kind review.