To My Secret Admirer #3 by Sally Law |
~**~True love asks no questions, makes no reservations, but puts itself unconditionally into the hands of the loved one. - Paula Marshall ~**~ Love always protects, and Is ever hopeful. 1 Corinthians 13 Dearest Secret Admirer, Good evening. I saw you tonight in a vision, standing by a tree in the shadows as if you were waiting for me. Am I in love with the idea of you, or you? My mom asked me that question over dinner and these things have been rolling around in my head. I am examining myself as I write you. It is very late, and these are my midnight confessions. My first response was, yes, unequivocally--yes. I am in love with what I know about you. Your loving words have penetrated my heart and have awakened me, as well. It's like being born again, all over again. As I was getting ready for work this morning, I pulled out my makeup case to begin the transformation. Staring at myself in the mirror, I saw someone else looking back. She was glowing and filled with love. That being said, it was just a little powder and lip balm, and I was out the door. Your most recent letter and Nonet vaporized me; and re-reading it makes me feel so very loved, adding to my joy. Unfortunately, not everyone in my life is happy for me. A few naysayers have stepped forward and questioned your motives. But, I have turned a deaf ear. They're all love cynics, and I don't appreciate their attempts to spoil my happiness. If this were not real, I wouldn't be feeling this way. One of them asked, "What if he's not attractive?" (I snapped, which is not like me.) I replied, "The man writing these beautiful love letters is handsome, with depth of heart and soul." I showed off your exquisite penmanship, and shared that you were both an artist and a poet. (By the way, thank you for the clue of your artist's identity.) Just one more thing I adore about you. As for your circumstances, I am at a loss unless you confide in me. They must be overwhelming if they prevent you from coming to me. What could they possibly be? Maybe you've had a bad breakup or divorce. Possibly an ex-wife, or alimony the size of the national debt--something relational that you perceive might cause me to run? As long as we love each other, I know we can overcome anything. I had a dying man under my care just last year. Burt was his name, and he was desperately in love. He asked me, "What can I offer Alice?" I answered with a question, which unfortunately drives men crazy. "Do you love her?" He blurted out, "Yes, with all my heart!" They were married in the hospital chapel, and I cried like a baby at the sight of those two as they said, "I do, in sickness and in health." He only lived four more months, but Alice told me those were the happiest days of her life. She never mentioned a word about Burt's cancer diagnosis, and would offer to come and sit with him, hold his hand, read out loud, or take him for walks to the solarium. You've accepted me with my physical limitations, but perhaps you fear I would look at you differently. If you are thinking that, stop right now! I love you, even without knowing what your exterior features are, what your name is, if you have a disability, an illness, or if you prefer dogs over cats. Please come and reveal yourself to me as soon as you can. If you need to attend to something, I understand. I know you'll come as soon as you are able. Don't waste a day thinking I won't accept you. I already have. Maybe we are a couple similar to Burt and Alice, finding happiness at last. Mr. Wonderful, I want all of you, to have and to hold you as my own. Anything less seems like a faulty substitute. I see the value of just one day in the hospital, and how fragile life is. I'm waiting for you, my love, with my arms wide open. In the meantime, we are still on for Christmas Eve Eve. I bought a gorgeous blue dress, shoes, stockings, pashmina wrap, purse, and earrings. I even had money left for a very distinguished looking tie. I know how to stretch a buck. Thank you, again, for the generous gift card and special dinner date so close to Christmas. Hopefully, my back will be repaired enough to dance. If not, I'll just hold you. The best is yet to come for us; I just know this for a fact. Enclosed is a song for your MP3 player. I send you all my love with my evening prayers and thoughts of you. Kristin XOXOXO PS~ My back surgery was moved up to Halloween. I'll be a fright, and looking ever-so-lovely in my faded hospital gown. The last time I was here, my issued gowns had no ties. They had fallen off from so many washings. (My mom gave me a package of jumbo safety pins, just in case those pitiful gowns find me again.) Come on by my room; I'm planning on giving out chocolate kisses to all my visitors.
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Sally Law
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