I hired Harambe to hack the site
with skills of 1s and 0s.
He found the info I required
and secrets they enclose.
I now know every member's name.
Yes, this might sound profound.
With addresses and Google Map...
so easily you're found.
And this is how it's going to work,
so listen very close,
The options that I offer here
aren't hard to diagnose.
I know some guys who know some guys
that earn a shady pay,
that "hypothetically" might kill
"FanStorians," per se.
So please consider cautiously
before your kind review.
Would dare you give me less than six
with crosshairs aimed at you?
I know it sounds a bit extreme
to perish for a five,
but is the risk for rating less
worth staying, say...alive?
For each review must be pristine
and nothing less than six.
Plus, keep in mind there's little flaw
a bullet couldn't fix.
I'll post on Sunday afternoon
when all are stocked anew.
Don't toy in ruse, "I've spent them all."
A farce we both see through.
I've paid the fee of four small bucks
with promising intent,
to win this prompt with praised reviews
that masks your discontent.
So I suggest if one loves life
to willingly comply.
Should six or death both seem unjust
then simply pass it by.
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