Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet
Got bored and said "well stuff it"
After a while, the spider arrived
Miss Muffet was gone, he felt deprived

Miss Muffet ran off and met Beau Peep
But Miss Muffet was allergic to sheep
She sneezed and sneezed and then fell down
And was then rescued by Bobo the clown

Bobo was smitten and made a proposal
Poor Miss Muffet nearly went postal
The clown was scary and Miss Muffet wept
And ran away quickly while Bobo slept

She rested a while, sat down in a field
Relaxing but still kept her eyes peeled
For signs of trouble and scary clowns
Today was definitely a day of frowns.

She sat until she saw the moon
And a dish run away with a spoon
In the garden she saw a girl called Mary
With silver bells who was eating a cherry

Mary was hungry like a pig at a trough
She nearly bit Muffet, so Muffet was off
Onto her tuffet back in her garden
The spider appears and says "Beg your pardon"

Muffet, Muffet, where have you been?
I came earlier you weren't to be seen
Miss Muffet looked up and loudly screamed
Off she ran again. The spider redeemed.