Actions are louder than word

Actions do speak louder than words, and many are masterful at these nonverbal gymnastics. However, when nonverbal communication is used to the extreme, the behavior may border on crassness. Such extremes may also demonstrate passive-aggressive behavior.

There are many ways to determine whether you are engaging in nonverbal combat. For example, you may believe you had a pleasant chat with someone and had a successful outcome, but when that person departed, they slammed the door so hard, the room shook. This may connote dissatisfaction, rage, or irritation.

You may not be communicating with someone when he or she looks everywhere and at everything except you. Many interpret a lack of eye contact to mean the individual is not telling the truth, or maybe setting the speaker up for some unpleasant event. That's something everyone must decide for themselves, which makes it doubly important to stay actively engaged in the conversation.

You know the receiver is not communicating with you when his or her facial muscles contort in an effort to startle you to quietness. Some may raise their eyebrows to their hairline or heave audible sighs. Usually such behavior is passive aggressive and shows either rudeness or disrespect. Overt actions such as finger tapping or foot tapping may be evidence that the listener is impatient, bored or have little respect for the speaker. Such actions are condescending and may imply the speaker’s message is not worth the listener’s time.

There is little doubt your message is not received when you communicate with an individual whose legs and arms are crossed so tight they are practically sealed as they stare fixedly at you. Usually, these individuals' minds are close to what you are saying, so you may as well go on to the next subject or leave, unless you, too, are pining for an argument.

If an individual doodles during your conversation with them, it's usually a clear indication he or she is finding some measure of solace in their drawing and may not  be interested in what you are saying. This type is not usually  mean-spirited, but may lack the ability to focus, or may have active minds that are incapable of mental multi-tasking.

Folks have myriad ways to convey their thoughts and actions nonverbally, but you must look for  indicators. It is important to always be cognizant of how you present yourself to others and watch how they present to you.

Nonverbal actions are acquired over a period of time and may come in handy when you want to prove a point with a contemporary, but they do not have a place in the office or more formal settings. Nonverbal actions may not always be negative, however. Look at folks in love, and you will see a whole range of covert moves, but ordinarily one should always speak to be understood and not have others guessing what he or she is saying through nonverbal moves and actions.