Last night I had a dream,
Was walking on a narrow beam,
Over a volcano, that's quite a scene,
And sat cross-legged for strawberries and cream.

The raspberries were blood red,
Split wide open and quite dead,
The stalk was shaped just like a head,
So much so I called him Fred.

The volcano people were overfed,
With flesh and bones on buttered bread,
One popped up and sort-of sort said,
"I'd like to eat you raw instead".

Well, I thought, that's a bit extreme,
But then I saw a parade-ground team,
Of Navy Seals eating steam,
And sewing up a carpet seam.

Bum's sore now so stood up straight,
I didn't want to act as bait,
So ran along, shedding weight,
And clattered into an iron gate.

Now slimmed right down I slipped right through,
With lava chasing, you would too,
Oops, blackberries off, need the loo,
There's the toilet, I'll sit and, erm, wait...

The blueberries were full of woe,
As they watched me sit and go,
Then they start to glow and grow,
And disappear in a puff of snow.

It snowed along for hours and hours,
But I was dry under warm sunflowers,
Great big tall ones, just like towers,
With dripping leaves of sticky showers.

Suddenly was in the sink,
Full of wine, let's have a drink,
Slurped it up and seemed to shrink,
Walked around and fell off the brink.

In the canal, where ginger nuts play,
They can't stop talking, must have their say,
I got fed up and swam away,
To live and listen another day.

Climbed on out, already dry,
When an earwig poked me in the eye,
"Wake up", he said, "And say goodbye",
"Your day job looms, the sun's up high".

And so it was, and I must fly,
Around the globe and through the sky,
Passengers and crew rely,
On me for safety, not crash and die.

Day's nearly over, back to bed,
To my world, adventures ahead,
This is where I thrive instead,
In dreamland, where my mind's misled.