A Shiver of Sharks
A 5-7-5 for the contest80 total reviews
Comment from Aussie
Good luck with your 5-7-5 contest entry! Even our wildlife has gone feral. I saw the video on the shark frenzy. Perhaps they have had enough of drum-lines. I am totally against killing of our sea creatures, just so man can have a swim in their ocean?
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2020
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Good luck with your 5-7-5 contest entry! Even our wildlife has gone feral. I saw the video on the shark frenzy. Perhaps they have had enough of drum-lines. I am totally against killing of our sea creatures, just so man can have a swim in their ocean?
Comment Written 14-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2020
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Thanks, Aussie. I appreciate your sixth star and absolutely agree with your remarks. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from Pearl Edwards
There are always plenty of sharks around, and not all are in the ocean when there is misfortune to be found. I like the pink 'flesh' makes that standout. A well thought out 5-7-5 poem Tony could apply to both the the human or the oceanic world.
cheers,
valda
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2020
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There are always plenty of sharks around, and not all are in the ocean when there is misfortune to be found. I like the pink 'flesh' makes that standout. A well thought out 5-7-5 poem Tony could apply to both the the human or the oceanic world.
cheers,
valda
Comment Written 14-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2020
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Thanks, Valda. I appreciate your review. You've nailed it! All good wishes, Tony.
Comment from DeboraDyess
Hi! I like your short poem! Is that what they're called -- a shiver? How appropriate1 And diving in to misfortune for their pound of flesh' -- brilliant! This is a wonderful entry for the 5-7-5 contest. Well written, word usage is great. :)
I enjoyed!
Be blessed,
Deb
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2020
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Hi! I like your short poem! Is that what they're called -- a shiver? How appropriate1 And diving in to misfortune for their pound of flesh' -- brilliant! This is a wonderful entry for the 5-7-5 contest. Well written, word usage is great. :)
I enjoyed!
Be blessed,
Deb
Comment Written 14-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2020
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Many thanks for your review, Deb. Glad you enjoyed this one. Yes, apparently the collective noun is actually 'a shiver'!
Comment from Miss Cookie Atkinson
I like the artwork you choose to go with your poem, they are a perfect match. And how they skin shine like silver under water what a beautiful sight. Yes you captured my attention from the start.
Cookie
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2020
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I like the artwork you choose to go with your poem, they are a perfect match. And how they skin shine like silver under water what a beautiful sight. Yes you captured my attention from the start.
Cookie
Comment Written 14-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2020
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Many thanks for your supportive review, Cookie. Appreciated.
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Your very welcome.
have a nice Sunday
Cookie
Comment from Gloria ....
What I really like about this one is there is more than one way to interpret the meaning. I see it as aggressive sharks smelling blood descending to tear apart a victim of some kind of misfortune which could be many.
That said, a most intelligent write that has lasting and universal appeal.
Good luck to you with the Contest Committee.
Gloria
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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What I really like about this one is there is more than one way to interpret the meaning. I see it as aggressive sharks smelling blood descending to tear apart a victim of some kind of misfortune which could be many.
That said, a most intelligent write that has lasting and universal appeal.
Good luck to you with the Contest Committee.
Gloria
Comment Written 14-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Thanks very much for your review, Gloria, and for bestowing a sixth star on this short poem. I shall have that to console me when the Contest Committee consigns it to the depths!
Comment from Ogden
Your poem and illustration make a dramatic impression, and are an excellent start.
Tony, doesn't "diving into misfortune" indicate the sharks will be the victims, and "pound of flesh" also suggest paying a price for their deed? How else is the reader supposed to interpret it?
Don
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2020
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Your poem and illustration make a dramatic impression, and are an excellent start.
Tony, doesn't "diving into misfortune" indicate the sharks will be the victims, and "pound of flesh" also suggest paying a price for their deed? How else is the reader supposed to interpret it?
Don
Comment Written 14-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2020
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Hi, Don. Thanks for your review of my poem. It was meant as an extended metaphor about loan sharks preying on other people's misfortune and, like Shylock, demanding their pound of flesh. All good wishes, Tony
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I guess you couldn't find an illustration depicting vicious loan sharks intermingling in the frenzied school. ;)
Comment from Minglement
What a great entry for the 5-7-5 Poetry contest. I love the aliteration in the first line. Sharks are fascinating creatures, and you chose interesting artwork to accompany your creation. Love the colors speaking of the deep and mysterious. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2020
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What a great entry for the 5-7-5 Poetry contest. I love the aliteration in the first line. Sharks are fascinating creatures, and you chose interesting artwork to accompany your creation. Love the colors speaking of the deep and mysterious. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2020
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Thanks very much for your review, Minglement. Appreciated. Best wishes, Tony
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My pleasure. Take care, Marcia
Comment from diamondbogle
I love this! Its really cool. I love sharks so much and the picture you put was awesome as well. I like how your poem flows nicely. Overall very good job with this little poem. It made me want to go to the aquarium.
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2020
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I love this! Its really cool. I love sharks so much and the picture you put was awesome as well. I like how your poem flows nicely. Overall very good job with this little poem. It made me want to go to the aquarium.
Comment Written 13-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2020
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Thanks, Diamondbogle. I appreciate your review. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from Cindy Warren
I wonder who took that picture. The thought of being that close to them makes me shiver. Are they diving into misfortune? I hope not. I wouldn't want to get too close to them, but I wouldn't want them hurt, either. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2020
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I wonder who took that picture. The thought of being that close to them makes me shiver. Are they diving into misfortune? I hope not. I wouldn't want to get too close to them, but I wouldn't want them hurt, either. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 13-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2020
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Thanks, Cindy. I had loan sharks in mind, preying on the unfortunate. Shylock's 'pound of flesh'. Best wishes, Tony
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Oops, guess I've been watching too much Animal Planet. They look like hammerheads. Creeps were chumming the water and finning them. Guess I still have shark week on the brain.
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Love the image and alliteration SHiver of SHarks. Wherein is their misfortune--I figure they're pretty lucky to be lunching on flesh! Good luck with this whimsical poem! Cheers. LIZ
Congrats on your prize Tony! You certainly changed this since I read it and saw the photo of sharks and took them literally--this latest version with the whimsical cartoon and the desk sign spelling it out for us who are metaphorically challenged! Kudos for crediting Pantygynt for the brilliant play on shylock (I like to think that would have tipped me off in itself)! Cheers. LIZ
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2020
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Love the image and alliteration SHiver of SHarks. Wherein is their misfortune--I figure they're pretty lucky to be lunching on flesh! Good luck with this whimsical poem! Cheers. LIZ
Congrats on your prize Tony! You certainly changed this since I read it and saw the photo of sharks and took them literally--this latest version with the whimsical cartoon and the desk sign spelling it out for us who are metaphorically challenged! Kudos for crediting Pantygynt for the brilliant play on shylock (I like to think that would have tipped me off in itself)! Cheers. LIZ
Comment Written 13-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2020
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Thanks, Liz. I had loan sharks in mind, preying on the unfortunate. Shylock's 'pound of flesh'. Best wishes, Tony
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DUH--sorry! I told you I am hopelessly literal-minded! I was going by the picture. Cheers. LIZ
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No worries. It can be taken both ways. Some have even related it to Covid-19 looting!
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Corona has certainly infected the collective brain--I had one of my poems misinterpreted. I used the words "social smiles" and it was construed as related to social distancing!
