Revenge
Viewing comments for Chapter 7 "Revenge - Chap 7"Evil stalks the dynamic crime team
22 total reviews
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Cat and mouse and mouse and cat--my head is spinning. I am astounded that they planned for Allie to know it wasn't Jaz--I assume it's to prolong the torment.
Inconsistent spelling: MariAn and MariOn varying throughout
"Yes, it is." He expected Cheryl to continue but SHE appeared enthralled with the sunrise,
"With impeccable=>IMPECCABLY) thought-out timing,
Cheryl edged away [for=>FROM] Charles in case he might hug her again. I intend to see how smart she really is PERIOD
Cheryl squealed and recoiled [OMIT away].
Since his return, he now [choices=>CHOOSES] the role I play
Inside, costumes of every kind [line=>LINED] one wall, and an entire wardrobe of dresses filled the adjacent wall.
every other necessity [OMIT one would need].
Ask him what I need to wear PERIOD
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2021
Cat and mouse and mouse and cat--my head is spinning. I am astounded that they planned for Allie to know it wasn't Jaz--I assume it's to prolong the torment.
Inconsistent spelling: MariAn and MariOn varying throughout
"Yes, it is." He expected Cheryl to continue but SHE appeared enthralled with the sunrise,
"With impeccable=>IMPECCABLY) thought-out timing,
Cheryl edged away [for=>FROM] Charles in case he might hug her again. I intend to see how smart she really is PERIOD
Cheryl squealed and recoiled [OMIT away].
Since his return, he now [choices=>CHOOSES] the role I play
Inside, costumes of every kind [line=>LINED] one wall, and an entire wardrobe of dresses filled the adjacent wall.
every other necessity [OMIT one would need].
Ask him what I need to wear PERIOD
Comment Written 21-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2021
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Thanks so much. Liz. Writing keeps me sane, but it doesn't stop me from making stupid errors. My brain isn't focusing as it should. The rocky road turned into something much worse again. I apologize for my sloppiness.
I thank you for reading and bearing with me as I try to mend the mistakes.... I appreciate it very much.
Always, Carol
Comment from Ric Myworld
Who can we trust . . . or should I say, can we trust anyone? But it sure makes the story interesting. LOL. I hope all is well in your world! Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2021
Who can we trust . . . or should I say, can we trust anyone? But it sure makes the story interesting. LOL. I hope all is well in your world! Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 21-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2021
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Thanks so much for the review and for enjoying my story. I hope it continues to draw your interest. It's tough to be able to read, review, answer, and write...but I am trying to do my best. Thank you for understanding.
Hugs, Carol
Comment from Carol Clark2
Wow! There are so many people trying to play tricks on others in this chapter. Intriguing! Note: Marian's name is spelled sometimes with an o and some with an a. Also: He expected Cheryl to continue, but (she) appeared enthralled.... I hesitate to think what might be planned for Allie.
Blessings. Carol
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2021
Wow! There are so many people trying to play tricks on others in this chapter. Intriguing! Note: Marian's name is spelled sometimes with an o and some with an a. Also: He expected Cheryl to continue, but (she) appeared enthralled.... I hesitate to think what might be planned for Allie.
Blessings. Carol
Comment Written 21-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2021
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Thank you, Carol
I thank you for reading and bearing with me as I try to mend the mistakes.... I appreciate it very much.
Writing keeps me sane, but it doesn't stop me from making stupid errors. My brain isn't focusing as it should. The rocky road turned into much worse again. I apologize for my sloppiness.
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I understand your stress. I don't consider it sloppiness. We can proofread and we don't see things because our brains read them correctly. So sorry for your rocky road. Praying for you & your family. Carol
Comment from BethShelby
You really need to get us good an confused before you start make it all come together. I think Vito is going by the name of James and he seems to be married to Marian who doesn't really have dementia but is pretenting to. The little darling in the red room must be Jaz who apparently was given something a little stronger than melatonin. The tatoo on the dead girl seems to have deliberately done wrong so Allie would know the difference but why kill someone and go to all that trouble to make her believe her sister was dead if she was supposed to realize she wasn't. Like I say, I'm bit confused at this point.
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2021
You really need to get us good an confused before you start make it all come together. I think Vito is going by the name of James and he seems to be married to Marian who doesn't really have dementia but is pretenting to. The little darling in the red room must be Jaz who apparently was given something a little stronger than melatonin. The tatoo on the dead girl seems to have deliberately done wrong so Allie would know the difference but why kill someone and go to all that trouble to make her believe her sister was dead if she was supposed to realize she wasn't. Like I say, I'm bit confused at this point.
Comment Written 21-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2021
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Sorry, Beth... It is a complicated plan. I'll try to help.... When released from prison, Vito assumed James's identity and the film studio, believing that Marion had dementia and would not know it wasn't her dead husband. He staged the video and killed Angel, so Allie would think her sister was shot or dead and come to Savannah, Georgia. Once he has her there, he wants to play Clue or Cat and a Mouse game toying with her until he reaches his final plan. Of course, Charles (his buddy) is in on it as well. The fake tattoo was so Allie would not mistake the burnt body.... Vito wanted her to witness the terror of seeing her sister dead, not once, but twice. It was emotionally gruesome and painful regardless of who the woman was, but now she knows it isn't Jaz, and she will search.
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I didn't mean for you to have to go to all that trouble to explain. I've had things on my mind lately with my son's wedding coming up Sunday so I've probably missed some things. That clears everything up. Don't pay attention to my questions? I don't mean for you to write me personally. I know it will all clear up for me before it is over.
Beth
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Just knowing that someone cares about the story and is trying to follow it makes me happy so don't worry yourself a bit. Life is on the downhill slope again and I have been unintentionally sloppy. I need to get my act together.
I hope you have a wonderful wedding and all of you enjoy the blessed day.
Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from karenina
You delight and amaze with all the interlocking pieces of this literary puzzle! I'm barely able to catch my breath regarding Allie viewing what wasn't Jaz's body and here we are-- Overdoses! Pseudo-dementia maybe? Double/triple crosses.
So James wanted the tattoo to reveal that body wasn't Jaz? Oh you dastardly plotter you! I can hardly wait for the next chapter...
Just two things I noticed... (Thank GOD I'm not the only one to slip up!)--
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Marion or Marian? (smile)
"Charles' eyes darted toward James. "Maybe we should ask>> Lady Marian<< before we get too excited."
"Oh, she'll jump at the chance." Cheryl edged away for Charles in case he might hug her again. "You know how much she loves to act."
"Great idea, Cheryl. Hurry and ask >>Marion<<." James stared at Charles. "Please shut the door. I want a word with you before you go."
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"he now>> choices<< the role I play and gives me the scripts---Chooses?
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I'd give it a six if I had one...You know me. It's Thursday and my budget is busted!
Carry on. Your fans await!
Karenina
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2021
You delight and amaze with all the interlocking pieces of this literary puzzle! I'm barely able to catch my breath regarding Allie viewing what wasn't Jaz's body and here we are-- Overdoses! Pseudo-dementia maybe? Double/triple crosses.
So James wanted the tattoo to reveal that body wasn't Jaz? Oh you dastardly plotter you! I can hardly wait for the next chapter...
Just two things I noticed... (Thank GOD I'm not the only one to slip up!)--
---
Marion or Marian? (smile)
"Charles' eyes darted toward James. "Maybe we should ask>> Lady Marian<< before we get too excited."
"Oh, she'll jump at the chance." Cheryl edged away for Charles in case he might hug her again. "You know how much she loves to act."
"Great idea, Cheryl. Hurry and ask >>Marion<<." James stared at Charles. "Please shut the door. I want a word with you before you go."
-----
"he now>> choices<< the role I play and gives me the scripts---Chooses?
------
I'd give it a six if I had one...You know me. It's Thursday and my budget is busted!
Carry on. Your fans await!
Karenina
Comment Written 21-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2021
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I have fixed the suggestions and apologize for being so far behind. I appreciate you regardless if I am tardy in telling you so. Thank you so much.
Hugs, Carol
Comment from Mary Shifman
I really enjoyed this chapter. I think I like it best, so far. I don't like Charles or James and I like it that Cheryl and Marian are pulling the wool over their eyes. I can't wait to find out who Cheryl called to tell them the 'game had begun." Excellent!
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2021
I really enjoyed this chapter. I think I like it best, so far. I don't like Charles or James and I like it that Cheryl and Marian are pulling the wool over their eyes. I can't wait to find out who Cheryl called to tell them the 'game had begun." Excellent!
Comment Written 21-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2021
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Forgive me please for my poor display of gratitude and appreciation. I truly am grateful for all your time, your review and your thoughtfulness. I'm struggling with life and I apologize for neglecting your efforts. I am weeks behind in responding so I must at least cut and paste a thank you and hope you understand. I am thrilled that you have taken the time to read my story and to enjoy it.
Smiles, hugs and much love for all the support.
Carol
Comment from lyenochka
Oh! Lady Marian is not all she seemed to Vito and Charles. Does she know that Vito is playing "James" ? I guess you will unravel it all for us. I like it! Hope she is in touch with the criminal investigation team!
he now choices the role I play and gives me the scripts. (chooses)
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2021
Oh! Lady Marian is not all she seemed to Vito and Charles. Does she know that Vito is playing "James" ? I guess you will unravel it all for us. I like it! Hope she is in touch with the criminal investigation team!
he now choices the role I play and gives me the scripts. (chooses)
Comment Written 21-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2021
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Forgive me please for my poor display of gratitude and appreciation. I truly am grateful for all your time, your review and your thoughtfulness. I'm struggling with life and I apologize for neglecting your efforts. I am weeks behind in responding so I must at least cut and paste a thank you and hope you understand. I am thrilled that you have taken the time to read my story and to enjoy it.
Smiles, hugs and much love for all the support.
Carol
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No worries, Carol. We all understand! 💖💖🙏
Comment from Gert sherwood
Begin Again
Your chapter in the book Revenge
Revenge - Chap 7
I like how you are keeping me wondering when the game begins. Guess I must wait for your next chapter.
Gert
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2021
Begin Again
Your chapter in the book Revenge
Revenge - Chap 7
I like how you are keeping me wondering when the game begins. Guess I must wait for your next chapter.
Gert
Comment Written 21-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2021
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Forgive me please for my poor display of gratitude and appreciation. I truly am grateful for all your time, your review and your thoughtfulness. I'm struggling with life and I apologize for neglecting your efforts. I am weeks behind in responding so I must at least cut and paste a thank you and hope you understand. I am thrilled that you have taken the time to read my story and to enjoy it.
Smiles, hugs and much love for all the support.
Carol
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Begin Again, I under stand, I look forward to read your writing
Gert
Comment from Terry Broxson
The plot thickens, what an interesting group of characters we have here. Seems like double cross, maybe even triple cross, It will be interesting to see who is left standing at the end. There maybe a typo in the line "Charles Wailed"...do you need the be? Good Job.
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2021
The plot thickens, what an interesting group of characters we have here. Seems like double cross, maybe even triple cross, It will be interesting to see who is left standing at the end. There maybe a typo in the line "Charles Wailed"...do you need the be? Good Job.
Comment Written 21-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2021
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Forgive me please for my poor display of gratitude and appreciation. I truly am grateful for all your time, your review and your thoughtfulness. I'm struggling with life and I apologize for neglecting your efforts. I am weeks behind in responding so I must at least cut and paste a thank you and hope you understand. I am thrilled that you have taken the time to read my story and to enjoy it.
Smiles, hugs and much love for all the support.
Carol
Comment from royowen
They are a charming bunch of people who get their fun from being mean to one another, judt normal folk. It seems like Marian is not quite as dimeter as she appears. And now the sleeping tablets have been administered, or have taken by the actress and now cunning old Marian is playing the part of....well done Carol, blessings Roy
Typo : he now (choices) the role. Chooses?
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2021
They are a charming bunch of people who get their fun from being mean to one another, judt normal folk. It seems like Marian is not quite as dimeter as she appears. And now the sleeping tablets have been administered, or have taken by the actress and now cunning old Marian is playing the part of....well done Carol, blessings Roy
Typo : he now (choices) the role. Chooses?
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2021
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Forgive me please for my poor display of gratitude and appreciation. I truly am grateful for all your time, your review and your thoughtfulness. I'm struggling with life and I apologize for neglecting your efforts. I am weeks behind in responding so I must at least cut and paste a thank you and hope you understand. I am thrilled that you have taken the time to read my story and to enjoy it.
Smiles, hugs and much love for all the support.
Carol
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No apology needed dear Carol, I understand,