Your Honour
200 word flash fiction63 total reviews
Comment from mprsflame
LOL- excuse the Internet shortcut, please, but that last paragraph was laughable and in this day and age could be painfully true. So your note about pleading "guilty to taking some liberties with the justice system" was a wonderful tribute to the story and helped fulfill the humor.
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2013
LOL- excuse the Internet shortcut, please, but that last paragraph was laughable and in this day and age could be painfully true. So your note about pleading "guilty to taking some liberties with the justice system" was a wonderful tribute to the story and helped fulfill the humor.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2013
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Thank you.
Wouldn't happen often, but you wouldn't be surprised to discover that it had happened.
Steve
Comment from steevie
"If it please(s) Your Honour," she murmured huskily, "just time for a drink and then .... your reward."
Who was she talking to below? The courtroom was empty.
Unrecognizable now from the plain figure in the dock, she returned through the deserted courtroom. "That piece of garbage deserved everything he got," she thought, restraining the laughter that threatened to well up. She tapped lightly on an unmarked door.
the writing was good but the story line was thin ... very unlikely scenario
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2013
"If it please(s) Your Honour," she murmured huskily, "just time for a drink and then .... your reward."
Who was she talking to below? The courtroom was empty.
Unrecognizable now from the plain figure in the dock, she returned through the deserted courtroom. "That piece of garbage deserved everything he got," she thought, restraining the laughter that threatened to well up. She tapped lightly on an unmarked door.
the writing was good but the story line was thin ... very unlikely scenario
Comment Written 26-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2013
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'If it please...' is a standard way of politely asking for permission to address the court - may be English usage - here, of course, it is said jokingly.
The other bit you quoute she is thinking, not speaking - a couple of people have taken me up for my usage of quotation marks here, but I have checked it out and it is still a valid way of showing characters' thoughts, although italics now seems to be the preferred way.
And unlikely doesn't mean it can't happen - don't tell me you've never heard of a corrupt judge...
There, I've gone and defended it!
Thanks for the review and suggested improvements.
Steve
Comment from pam60
This was excellent flash fiction. It had a surprise ending that I did not see coming. It was a pleasurable lighthearted read and I found myself smiling at the ending. Very clever how she transformed herself completely. Story well told. Good work. Pam
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2013
This was excellent flash fiction. It had a surprise ending that I did not see coming. It was a pleasurable lighthearted read and I found myself smiling at the ending. Very clever how she transformed herself completely. Story well told. Good work. Pam
Comment Written 26-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2013
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Thanks, Pam
Steve
Comment from Gideon300
Whoa Nellie! It makes you wonder about really what you see, may not be what is real. Nice job on capturing the requirements of the writers prompt. Nice work, twisted, preverse and fun.
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2013
Whoa Nellie! It makes you wonder about really what you see, may not be what is real. Nice job on capturing the requirements of the writers prompt. Nice work, twisted, preverse and fun.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2013
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Thank you!
Steve
Comment from kashmayank
This was intersting said a lot in a few words and I liked the thought behind the story sexy is not bad it is always good :)
all the best
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2013
This was intersting said a lot in a few words and I liked the thought behind the story sexy is not bad it is always good :)
all the best
Comment Written 26-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2013
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Thanks for the review and the six stars - appreciated.
Steve
Comment from SecretQuill
I thought this piece was amazing. I find it immensely difficult as a writer to complete short pieces that are true, great forms of literature. For this, I comend you. Although the characters were not given much description, I was instantly drawn in and was capitivated until the end. In addition, being introduced to the story in the middle, with little context instantly began the story on the perfect note.
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2013
I thought this piece was amazing. I find it immensely difficult as a writer to complete short pieces that are true, great forms of literature. For this, I comend you. Although the characters were not given much description, I was instantly drawn in and was capitivated until the end. In addition, being introduced to the story in the middle, with little context instantly began the story on the perfect note.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2013
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Thank you for the great review - yes, it is tough to write a piece in so few words - as usual I went over the limit and then had to hack it down to size!
Steve
Comment from Righteous Riter
This story has it all. Deception, deceit and so on. Funny thing is because of TV, some people might actually believe this. Don't get me wrong, things like this happen but not to this magnitude. The writer does a good job in leading the reader where the reader needs to go.. Good work.
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2013
This story has it all. Deception, deceit and so on. Funny thing is because of TV, some people might actually believe this. Don't get me wrong, things like this happen but not to this magnitude. The writer does a good job in leading the reader where the reader needs to go.. Good work.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2013
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Thank you.
Steve
Comment from tedanytime
Perhaps the title should be 'Dishonor.' Good narrative that reveals the virtue of the defendant and the judge.
The story leaves one wanting to read a bit more about what has lead up to this trial. Seems the judge might have set his price too low. Still, it stands upon it's own.
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2013
Perhaps the title should be 'Dishonor.' Good narrative that reveals the virtue of the defendant and the judge.
The story leaves one wanting to read a bit more about what has lead up to this trial. Seems the judge might have set his price too low. Still, it stands upon it's own.
Comment Written 25-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2013
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Thank you.
Steve
Comment from muezza56
i enjoyed this, and i dont think any liberties of the justice system have been committed,history tells us that. and in this case it has some plausability to it! really well written with a good twist at the end
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2013
i enjoyed this, and i dont think any liberties of the justice system have been committed,history tells us that. and in this case it has some plausability to it! really well written with a good twist at the end
Comment Written 24-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2013
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Thank you.
Steve
Comment from ann33
I enjoyed your flash fiction story. It had the elements of tension, characterization and a twist ending. You told a complete story in 210 words. Well done.
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2013
I enjoyed your flash fiction story. It had the elements of tension, characterization and a twist ending. You told a complete story in 210 words. Well done.
Comment Written 24-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2013
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Thanks, Ann - glad you enjoyed.
Thanks for all the stars too.
Steve