FanStory.com - Stop! Now! by Jaq Cee
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I needed to fight to regain 'me'. (Read authors notes first)
My Life in words
: Stop! Now! by Jaq Cee
Feelings Poetry writing prompt entry

Going round in circles, ever they decrease,
Pulled into a vortex, never finding peace.
It's dark in here, let me out, can't take any more,
Feeling my way blindly, seeking that open door.


They tell me things get better, talk it's for the best,
Why then are my thoughts chaotic? Never do they rest.
This 'cancer's' killing me, in some pernicious way,
Slowly, deftly infiltrating, it has me as it's prey.


Years spent talking takes it's toll, having awful thoughts,
Day's are long and very dark, no anger at my lot.
Still I feel I should have known, should not have let it be,
Mentally beating myself each day, laid bare for all to see.


Tell me where I go from here? I want it all to end,
I need some respite from this hell, from having to pretend.
The happy, chatty cheery me, is just a sad facade,
Inside I'm dying, failing to see, it isn't me that's bad.


Darkness falls more frequently now, no light is seeping through,
Pulling my hair, sobbing each day not knowing what to do.
I want to end this torment now, help me through this storm,
My eyes are weary, spirit's weak, a heart that's truly torn.


The one bright light within my life, sometimes I cannot see,
My beautiful daughter, so full of life but getting more like me.
This scares me so, no one can see how this becomes a thorn,
To think she'll end up just like me, sad, dejected and forlorn.


I have to make those changes now, I need to find the way,
To pull myself back up and fight, progressing day by day.
This is one battle I have to win, I need to see it through,
Thoughts of leaving this world behind, must not ever ensue.


Writing Prompt
Emotions have overcome us all at one time or another. It could be from someone that broke our heart or just life in general. We all handle situations differently, some good, some bad. This contest gives us the ability to explore this. Write a poem that expresses feelings and emotions such as anger or depression. Any type of poem is welcomed.

Author Notes
This is about how helpless and worthless I felt. Went into therapy and bringing up the distant past for the first time ever sent me into a depression. I knew that I had to fight it for my daughters sake. There has only ever been me and her. I'm happy to say it's better now.

I used 'cancer' to describe depression as I see it as a similar thing, one ravages the mind, the other the body.
Thanks to Google images for the picture.

     

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