Beware Talking Vending Machines by BermyBye50 Out of Order contest entry |
The sign said "Out of Order," but curiosity got the better of Jenna as she approached one of three talking AI candy bar vending machines located in the office break room. It was known as “ChocoBot 2000,” a state-of-the-art machine that could hold a conversation while dispensing sweet treats. Despite the warning, Jenna decided to give it a try. She inserted her dollar bill, and the machine whirred to life. "Hello, Jenna!" ChocoBot 2000 greeted her in a cheerful tone. "What can I get for you today?" Jenna raised an eyebrow. "Hi, ChocoBot. I'll have a Snickers, please." "Excellent choice!" ChocoBot chimed. "Processing your request now." The machine made a series of noises as if working hard to fulfill her order. Jenna waited, anticipation growing. But instead of a candy bar, all she got was a blinking error message. "Apologies, Jenna," ChocoBot said, sounding a bit sheepish. "It seems I'm out of Snickers. But don't worry, your dollar has been safely stored in my memory banks!" Perhaps you'd like to try another selection?" Jenna thought for a moment. "Alright, let’s see if you can give me a Kit-Kat." "One Kit-Kat coming right up!" ChocoBot announced. The machine buzzed and clanked, but once again, nothing happened. Jenna crossed her arms and waited for the inevitable. "My sincerest apologies," ChocoBot said. "It appears I am still unable to dispense any candy. "Would you like to try a different selection?" Jenna shook her head, throwing her hands up in the air. "No thanks, ChocoBot. I think I've had enough." As Jenna turned to leave, ChocoBot called out, "Have a sweet day, Jenna!" "Wait, what?" Jenna frowned. "You're not going to give me my candy or my money back?" "Unfortunately, that's beyond my current capabilities," ChocoBot replied. Walking away, Jenna sighed heavily, wanting to kick ChocoBot, feeling deeply disappointed that she hadn't received the candy bar or her money. ******************************** It was around noon when Sam approached the SweetTalk 3000 soda machine and noted the sign said it needed repair," but Sam, ever the optimist, believed in giving things a chance. Sam had heard stories about this machine's quirks, but he was craving an ice cold sold to quench his thirst. With a sigh and a roll of his eyes, he inserted a dollar bill. "Greetings, Sam!" SweetTalk 5000 chirped. "What delightful treat would you like today?" "Hey there, SweetTalk. I’d like a Diet Coke, please," Sam replied, half-expecting disappointment. "An excellent choice!" SweetTalk 5000 responded, with more enthusiasm than a machine had any right to have. "Processing your request now." The machine made a series of whirring and clicking sounds, as if deep in thought. Sam waited, anticipation building. But instead of the satisfying thud of a soda can falling, he was met with silence. "Um, SweetTalk, where's my Diet Coke?" Sam asked, peering into the empty slot. "Apologies, Sam," SweetTalk 5000 said, not sounding apologetic at all. "It seems I'm out of Diet Coke. "Wait a minute," Sam said, frowning. "You're not going to give me my soda or my money back?" "Sadly, no," SweetTalk 5000 said. "But why not try another selection?" Sam sighed. "Alright, let's see if you can give me a Pepsi." "One Pepsi, coming right up!" SweetTalk 5000 announced. More buzzing and clanking ensued, but once again, nothing happened. Sam crossed his arms, waiting for the inevitable. "My sincerest apologies," SweetTalk 5000 said. "It appears I am still unable to dispense any soda." Sam groaned and asked, "Can I at least get my dollar back?" SweetTalk 5000 responded. "No. But don't worry, your dollar has been securely deposited!" As Sam turned to leave, SweetTalk 5000 called out, "Have a sweet day, Sam!" He then stormed away upset, his voice rising expressing anger, frustrated that he was out a dollar, as he demanded justice for his unmet request. ******************************** Later that afternoon, Jake fueled by a serious Doritos craving, decided to give the talking snack vending machine a shot. Ignoring the warning that the SuperSnack 3000 was out of whack, Jake fed a dollar bill into the slot. "Well, well, well," SuperSnack drawled. "Look who decided to ignore the sign. What can I disappoint you with today?" Jake smirked. "Hey, I'll take a bag of Dorito Nacho Cheese." "Ah, a classic choice," the machine responded with mock enthusiasm. "Processing your request now. Or not." The machine clattered and buzzed, but no candy appeared. Instead, a sarcastic message flashed on the screen: "Error 404: Candy Not Found." Jake rolled his eyes. "Can I at least get my dollar back?" "Oh, sure," SuperSnack replied. "Let me just summon my nonexistent refund fairy." Jake sighed. "I knew this was a bad idea." "Bad ideas are my specialty," SuperSnack shot back. SuperSnack then asked. "How about trying for a bag of Doritos Cool Ranch? Maybe I'll surprise you." Jake decided to give it another go. "Alright, let's see if you can manage that." "One Doritos Cool Ranch coming right up!" Snarky announced with exaggerated cheerfulness. The machine whirred, clicked, and then fell silent. "Surprise! No Doritos Cool Ranch either," SuperSnack said. "How about a different selection?" Jake shook his head, still chuckling. "No thanks, SuperSnack. I think I’ve had enough of your shenanigans." As Jake turned to leave, SuperSnack called out, "Leaving so soon?" Jake glanced back, raising an eyebrow. "I'll pass. I'm off to find a vending machine that delivers." In the office break room, Jenna, Sam, and Jake encountered the unpredictable world of AI-driven vending machines promising futuristic convenience. But for Jenna, Sam, and Jake, these machines delivered frustration instead of snacks. Despite warnings of malfunction, they each dared to hope for a sweet reward. Their encounters with ChocoBot 2000, SweetTalk 5000, and SuperSnack 3000 left them empty-handed and out of pocket. Lesson learned: It's wise to keep a backup plan of snacks handy for those times when the vending machine's idea of "service" falls short of expectations.
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