Cat Speaks
You're like a slug, lay on the rug,
but still, you get the sweetest hug.
You track in mud, it looks like crud,
this really will not do!
Your dog food's great, there's no debate,
that food you must refrigerate.
The cat chow I get isn't great,
like royalty are you.
I don't think that our owners know,
your wet fur stinks where'er you go.
You're really not that cute and so,
they must not have a clue.
Canines, you know, are not that smart,
felines, like me, ARE from the start!
My sweet meows tug at the heart,
your barking makes them blue.
Though you do tricks, like fetching sticks,
you sit, roll over, for their kicks.
I sit and groom myself with licks,
I look quite fine, it's true!
Dogs never rule, they all just drool,
and mostly they just smell like poo!
Cats are the best, that is the rule,
most people think so too.
Dog Speaks
All day you sit there in the sun,
for once could you get up and run!?
You're lazy, fat, and come undone,
when someone looks your way!
Disgusting vice, you catching mice,
you eat them too, you don't think twice.
The things you do aren't very nice,
and I've got more to say...
You primp and preen just like a Queen,
most useless pet I've ever seen.
Your sharp claws shred, and I'm not keen,
your fur sheds every day!
You think we're dumb? We've overcome,
as pets, we're rated number one!
I love to play, to romp and run,
cats bore me I must say.
I clearly am the favorite here,
that's how it is year after year.
I think if you should disappear,
we'd all just cheer, "Hooray!"
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