By Brent & Sami
Divine Canvas
My belly is full,
Of a blissful new heartbeat.
I feel euphoric.
God created me.
A flower that will give life.
Senses budding love.
Motherhood is art.
Brushes dipped in fresh paint.
Eager to create.
Written by Brent B.
| Author Notes | I want to hear how the poem affects you. What kind of emotions does is stir up in your heart. Let me know! |
By Brent & Sami
Warning: The author has noted that this contains the highest level of violence.
Life is Precious (Journal entry 9)
One fall night,
I was sitting at a planned parenthood.
I had just gotten out of a relationship.
One where my boyriend raped me.
I know, I know, that is intense.
Let me borrow your attention for a minute.
Why my legs shake at this clinic.
And I conteplate the meaning of life.
Is it heartbeat,
Or is it a smile?
Do they have to feel?
Where does the guilt come from if it is not wrong?
If I tell my mother she will be mad.
I am only 15 and I don't really talk to my dad.
He never really told me about men.
How they can fall from glory
And act as if they were ten.
My God how did I get in this situation?
Well I gotta go.....
They are calling my name.
Wish me luck that I will make the right decision.
James 4:8
"Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded."
By Brent & Sami
Loose Lips
Your proclamations lie on the tip of your tongue
Your mouth is sore from not letting them out
Your lips are a dam, keeping your gospel from flowing
(The proclamations you wrote in your head and felt in your lungs)
Without speaking, you leave the world to drought
You could have saved us; hadn't you kept the world from knowing
Proverbs 12:22 "The LORD detests lying lips, but he delights in people who are trustworthy."
By Brent & Sami
I won't think too far away-
I'll lessen the city lights in my mind,
Turn down the heat of my belly's oven,
Make dull the point on my head.
Anything to ground myself here:
To fill my pockets with change,
To appease those around me,
To help myself feel comfortable,
As a child, I wanted to touch the clouds
And ride the waves with dolphins
I believed animals could talk to us
And imaginary friends were real
I'm a dreamer just like my ancestors
My heart yearns to be more
I am not on earth to make money,
But to deliver, create, and beautify
By Brent & Sami
Jokesmith (second version)
Once upon a time I was fine.
Laughing with glee, able to dine.
Without whiskey or expensive beer.
Life of the party dying with cheer.
Now I'm sober and living uprightly.
One where I smile ever so brightly.
One full of pretend and old jokes.
I hide my loud pain with a funny cloak.
Howling at everyone in this room.
My face red as a blood-soaked moon.
Paint thinning and starting to show.
A rotting mask of a child eating crow.
I am a joker laughing with rage.
Dancing in a nice comfortable cage.
I'm a fool leading the pack with jest.
Singing trauma with melodrama zest.
The joke is on you for laughing along.
Cawing and cooing along to this song.
My soul is freshly squeezed in his wrath.
God will always have the last laugh.
Proverbs 14:13
Even in laughter the heart may ache, and the end of joy may be grief.
By Brent & Sami
Just Pray About It
I told my mother I was suicidal.
She said, "just pray about it."
So now I am here Lord.
Praying away my life.
Yelling into the heavens
To free me from my stripes.
I told my wife that I am scared.
She said, "just pray about it."
So now I am here Lord
Crying on my knees
Begging for clarity.
Submitting to your decrees.
I told Jesus I feel like a slave
He said, "just repent from it."
So now I am here Lord.
Making mistakes left and right.
Angry, grieving, and overflowing.
My cup is filled to the brim with spite.
I told the devil, "I want to die."
He said, "just do it already."
He handed me a black rose
Bit into my heart like an apple.
I see Eve shaking her head.
My body hanging as I start to strangle.
I never thought being killed alive.
Would make me feel again.
I never was really good at tying knots
Always distracted in my spirit.
I think to myself intensely,
Thank God I chose to pray about it.
2 Corinthians 11:3
"But I am afraid that just as Eve was deceived by the serpent's cunning, your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ."
By Brent & Sami
I wish I could dig myself out of hell.
I feel I could if I find the right tool.
It's hot down here, my heart is not so well.
I burn in a tempestuous sad pool.
I wish I could climb a rope to heaven.
Ask God to answer all my prayers.
Talk to Jesus about my depression.
Does he hear me or Satan's thundering snare?
He beats my soul, a concerto of sin.
Strumming my heart strings; sounds of temptation.
The devil grins playing his mandolin.
A supernatural revelation.
By Brent & Sami
Excoriation Disorder # 3
You may scratch me off the earth
With the vengeful finger tips you chew
You may try to wash me away
But I will always be apart of you
You see me in your bathroom mirror
And blame me for your insecurities
I wonder if you really want me gone
If you're this obsessed with touching me
You're a villain who watches me bleed
And when I come back as someone worst
You know you wasted the effort to rid me
And I remain as someone you curse
You think I'm the enemy
But you have my intentions all wrong
I'm simply a manifestation of your mind
And a thought that's long gone
Psalm 34:19 "The righteous person may have many troubles,
but the Lord delivers him from them all"
By Brent & Sami
Honorable Revenge # 1
This enemy lives inside my head.
He's clever, wishes that I was dead.
His chemical warfare is sharp like a knife.
Cuts through my cognition, and into my life.
He is a paradox; in that we are one in the same.
A monstrosity of thought, a fountain of blame.
This enemy fights for a place inside my heart.
He burns with intense silence, a genetic spark.
As God as my witness, I will have my revenge!
I will fight with honor until the very end.
I will destroy, what attempts to destroy me.
I press forth, my darling revenge is my destiny.
Psalms 34:18
"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit."
By Brent & Sami
Rejection
Tears turn makeup into clay
A sad dress shining madness
It stings me until this day
A young girl full of gladness
Asks him to the dance in May
Never thought of anything less
What will I tell my black dress?
Hung and unworn she remains
Nowhere to dance she's lifeless
I pray in a closet of pain
Hoping for Sunday's best
God, please make this the last dress
1 Peter 2:4 (NIV): "As you come to him, the living Stone rejected by humans but chosen by God and precious to him."
By Brent & Sami
Lust
I shut my eyes so tight
They begin to bleed.
Drops of red
A gushing stampede.
I pluck out my blue eyes
A game of sinful chess.
A hairy beast;
Digs a hole in my flesh.
He burrows inside my heart.
Severing God's love.
His gnashing teeth
Chewing me up like crumbs.
I'll shave him with your razor.
Slice him up with grace
Lord make me clean.
Cut the lust save my face.
Matthew 5:29
"So if your eyes, even your good eye causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell."
By Brent & Sami
The Lonely Path
I rode on the devil's back.
A fiery rocking horse shaking me up.
Galloping through the stages of this life.
I had to sleep in hell for God to wake me up.
I'm coming out alive even if it kills me.
I grab God's umbilical cord and it shocks me.
I pace the corners of God's heart.
A frantic attempt to summon a friend.
Gasping for air as I travel through his vessel.
I must breathe and see that this is not the end.
I'm overflowing with love as I drink from his holy cup.
I broke the heart of the devil and this is the last break up.
I had to love Jesus first.
A humble crux nailing the hardness of the present.
I am holding on by a thread as he splits every fiber.
I hang from heaven with one hand on his garment.
Though I dangle like a dead leaf on a divine tree.
I wait for spring sowing pain graciously.
Psalm 37:23-24
The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD: And he delighteth in his way. Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down: For the LORD upholdeth him with his hand.
By Brent & Sami
Spiritual Mood Swings
I burrow in emotion
Hiding from the rest of the world.
I sigh with devotion,
God is my king, I am his pearl.
Hanging from his neck
Soaked in bloody misery.
He gives me a peck
Betrays with a kiss of destiny.
I laugh knowing I'm wrong
Losing myself in his grace.
So angry I sing my song.
Of rage and beautiful craze .
Confusion makes everything clear.
Questioning my swinging heart.
He blesses me as I reek of fear
He knows everything from the very start.
Matthew 11:28
Then Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.
By Brent & Sami
Spiritual Gangsta
I am stranded on a moonlit highway
Awake in a dream exploding with holy.
An old man shot like Ernest Hemmingway.
Bleeding colors that clot and ripe slowly.
I am baked in God's oven with plump love.
Metalallic roasting and burning rubber.
The mist in the air is white as a dove.
Nostrils flaring as they smell gunpowder.
It is quiet, I am absent from light.
Beezelbub hisses in my bloody ear.
He is roaring with suffering delight.
A lion feeding on my fleshly fear.
I crashed into hell and found a heaven.
I depart faithfully, blank perception.
"Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; For You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me." Psalms 23:4
By Brent & Sami
Trigger
Here comes the blade!
Stabs a hole inside of me.
Pours out every emotion,
I have ever felt.
Cathartic release of tension.
Skinning life; like an animal pelt.
Ecclesiastes 7:9: "Be not quick in your spirit to become angry,
for anger lodges in the heart of fools."
By Brent & Sami
Hard Boiled Easter
Head is so hard it is about to crack
Face is white impaled with your delusion
Words spitting like a monkey on my back
Fully fused two hearts yoked in confusion
Taste buds crackle hungry to prove a point
I'm spoiled rotten stinking with trauma
A glutton grunting no one hears my oink.
Broken eggs old and runny with drama.
Love is hard boiled steam from the heavens
Fighting with colors let's see whose brightest.
Devilling my heart fresh with attention.
Spicy sayings to prove I"m the wisest.
Sharp tongues cut into bone and through the soul.
God forgive me when I lose self-control.
Ephesians 4: 31-32
"Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you."
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